Roses are red, Violets are blue, My van is coming, I'm gonna get you!

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How do you make a tissue dance? You put a little boogie into in!

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Roses are red Violets are blue In Soviet Russia They had communism

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What did the man do when he saw there was water spilled on his desk? He waited two hours for it to evaporate because he was too lazy to wipe it up.

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what did helen keller name her dog? scruffy

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Yo momma's so dumb, she's not smart.

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How many Amish people does it take to change a light bulb? None because they don't believe in technology.

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Whats the square root of x^2? Variables cant be gay

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What's the difference between jelly and jam? Jelly doesn't contain pieces of fruit.

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my mom raped yerr foot

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what did the train say to the other train choo chooo

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oh hiya come in

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what is the difference between babies and trampolines? you take your shoes off when jumping on a trampoline

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What did the man from Hiroshima see when he looked up at the sky on August 6th, 1945? Some birds.

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So there's A blonde, a brunette and a redhead at a lake. they all swim across and have a picnic at the other end.

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Eine blonde Frau mit ihrem Sohn in Walmart, da sie die Lebensmittel-und Getränkebereich zu nähern, sehen sie ein mexikanischer Mann Blick in die Eier. Der Mann bittet um Hilfe aus der blonden Frau über die Qualität von Eiern. Sie sagt, ABD Eggs sind die besten, so dass die mexikanischen Kerl entscheidet, dass. Beim Verlassen des kleinen Jungen zeigt auf den Mexikaner Jungs Hut und ruft: "Aliens!" die Mutter bekommt wirklich peinlich und ruft ihren Sohn für sein Verhalten und sagt, es ist nicht richtig. Die Mutter wird erleichtert, dass sie sagen, dass die mexikanischen Kerl konnte nicht hören, da er Musik hören. Auf dem Weg aus der Mutter entdeckt einen violetten Flüssigkeit tropft aus der mexikanischen Jungs Haar. Sie fragt ihn, und er antwortet "Sein das Haargel". Die Blondine und Sohn nickt und setzt auf ihr Leben

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Roses are red, violets are blue and the sun is very hot

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Q. Why was the dad sad? A.His favorite team lost in the championship.

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knock knock who's there GET IN THE VAN!

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A seal walks into a club.

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what was hitlers rap album called? straight outta mein kampfton

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How often does a black women poop? Every nine months.

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You are in England which has a law about not moving traffic when these idk some kinda swans cross the road. You see a fat woman in a car and she is waiting for the swans to cross the road and she can't drive the car else she would get in trouble by law. What do you do? Feed her

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Why did the car stop. someone threw a cow at it.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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