How do you determine the population of mexico? Send out a census every 4 years.

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Why couldn't the pirate boy see the movie? He was blind.

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So a black man hails a taxi...

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What's the diffrents beetween a carrot and a dead baby? One I like to eat in my soup, the other one s a carrot.

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Which side of a chicken has more feathers? The outside.

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Why does Logan Cole beat off to Yo Gabba Gabba! ? Because Tim Tebow.

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Whats worse that a rhino hitting you in the face? A rhino with horns hitting you in the face

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Chuck Norris Isn't That tuff if he was he would come to my house and slam my head in they keyboaredehfiu;qbg;qebnuighqije9qp8ubwrsijpa

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What do you call a kid with no arms, no legs, and an eyepatch? Names.

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vagina, hehehehehehehe

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How do you get three Canadians out of a pool? Say "Hey guys time to get out of the pool."

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Thank you for booking with Anti-Joke Travel Agency. Here is your trip itinerary: 1. Your toilet

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knock knock zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz knock knock zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz knock kock ding dong ding di-ding dong zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz sigh weeeeeeeeeewooooooooooooooooo zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz hey yo wake up zzz-oh-huh-what-whos there i've been yelling for like five minutes oh sorry jim will you let me in already all right

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What did Helen Keller get for Christmas? A read along book

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hey guys check out my cool youtube video at https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ivQ_bezJjK0

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there are 2 black guys and a spanish guy in a car. who is driving? a sober, US citizen over the age of 16

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Knock knock Who's there? It's me, Dave. You still wanna go to the movies? Oh, yeah...let me grab my wallet.

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How many mice does it take to screw in a light bulb? Two.

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yo mamma's so stupid, she is not that smart.

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What do you do when a blonde throws a hand grenade at you? Run.

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Why didn't Jeffrey become a butler? He did become a butler.

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What does the alien say to the man? Nothing, because it is highly unlikely that an alien would ever land on Earth, and even more unlikely that they would speak the same language of us. On top of that, aliens would not know anything about our species, and would probably hide from us due to being frightened and eventually flee back to their home planet where we would never see them again because our techonology is not advanced enough and the chances that we would find their planet which is somewhere among the billions of planets in the universe, are slim.

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THIS IS NOT SPARTA! *pulls him out of the hole*

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say this really fast dick chick, chick, dick, dick chick,chick dick, dick chick if you cant like it

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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