why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a salad. salads can't fly planes.

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Why does Michael j. Fox make the best milkshakes? He uses the finest ingredients

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How did Swiper steal Dora's stuff? He shot her and then took her backpack.

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How many Jews can you fit into a car? Well, it depends on how many Jews there are and what kind of car it is.

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Knock knock. Who is it? The police officer. ok, im not home.

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123 Main street

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What is red, and bucket shaped? A red bucket.

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What do you call a black man digging a hole in the ground with a body covered in blood, bruises and stab marks next to him? An gardener, he uses a different type of fertiliser.

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why is 6 afraid of 7 ? because 7 is black.

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Cancer.

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so there are two muffins in an oven. one muffin says to the other muffin, "hey is it hot in here or is it just me?" the other muffin says, "holy sh*t your a talking muffin."

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What's worse then finding a finger in your Chili? Getting Mollested by a Pterodactyl.

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Did you hear about the new pirate movie? It was rated PG-13.

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Your social life.

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Why did the Muslim enter the bar? He didn't.

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A man walks into a bar with a sad-looking face. He orders a strong drink. The bartender asks him "What's wrong? You seem down." The man answers "Well, tough week. My wife was raped and murdered and my son was hit by a bus."

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zebras

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A blonde sits down in first class on a flight to Miami. That's because she had a ticket for the seat.

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What do you call a car with no wheels or engine? Immobile

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Why do women have boobs? So they can feed their newborn children without paying for expensive formula

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Why'd the chicken cross the road? It was hit by an oncoming motorist in a busy intersection.

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Q. What happened when a mouse ran up the clock and it struck 12? A. It fell off and got raped by an 80 year old Asian lady with breast cancer

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Alt F4

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Four rats are smoking in an alley. One rat turns to another and comments, "These are some fine smokes. Where'd ya score these?" The rat holding the pack of Menthols replies, "Off a' Fred." He points to a rotting whale carcass in the road. The other rats are horrified. "How did a whale die in the street?!," they squeak. "He didn't. He died on the beach."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops