how do you kill a blonde? hit her in the back repeatedly with a crowbar

thumb_up thumb_down +16

whats worse than the Holocaust....6 million Jews

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Knock Knock Get off my property or I'll call the cops on you!- Napoleon Dynamite

thumb_up thumb_down +16

A man walks into a bar. His friend follows him in, but the first man doesn't know he's there. They both order a beer, then a couple strong shots. The first man then notices his friend, and they exchange high-fives. The man's friend says, "Hey, how ya doin?" The first man says, "Okay, I guess, but I forgot the punchline." So the second man orders his friend the strongest drink, and the weakest. He replies, "Me too, Joe. Meeeeee, too."

thumb_up thumb_down +16

An old lady and her son walk into a hospital, only to find it covered in TRICERITOPS SHIT!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down +16

What did the turkey call the chicken? Nothing, turkeys can't speak, idiot.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

19th amendment

thumb_up thumb_down +14

...NO.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

why do they call it history? Women didn't do shit

thumb_up thumb_down +14

um...... What's worse than 15 babies stapled to trees? sixteen babies staples to trees PS: I will stop posting if 3 people don't like this by tommarow.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Scientology.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Haikus are easy, But sometimes they don't make sense. Refrigerator.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Why are you fat? You like devil dogs

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What did the homeless man get for Christmas? Nothing, he's Jewish.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Have you seen the movie "Constipation?" No. It hasn't come out yet! Of course there is no such movie in production and no plans for such a movie exist.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

A bear is chasing a rabbit through the woods. The rabbit stumbles into a genie while coming to a clearing. The Genie says, "I will give you both three wishes." The bear thinks quickly and says, "I wish every bear in the forest was female." The Genie then grants the wish. "And...now I wish that each bear in the country was female!" The Genie grants the wish. "AND I WISH THAT EVERY BEAR IN THE WORLD WAS FEMALE!!!" the bear exclaims, now getting overly excited by his wishes. The Genie grants the last wish and then turns to the rabbit. "Your turn." The rabbit wishes for a pair of running shoes and the well being of his family and friends. For his last wish he points at the bear and says, "I wish he was gay."

thumb_up thumb_down +12

who is the wildest wild one? matt daly

thumb_up thumb_down +12

"knock knock" "who's there" nobody answered cus it was a bunch of little shits playing knock a door run

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Boy: Mum... I got a hundred marks! Mother: That's good my son! Which subject was it? Boy: 30 for maths, 40 for english, and 30 for science.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Knock knock Who's there? Gung chee Gung chee who? That's my full name.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

how do you fall off a building? you trip.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Roses are red Violets are blue I hate sex Especially with you

thumb_up thumb_down +10

what is black and white and red all over.....a nun being murdered

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? Neither has he, he's blind.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops