Q. What's louder than one dinosaur? A. A whole bunch of dinosaurs.

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Why did the baby cross the road? It was being dragged by a truck

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There once was an X from place B, Who satisfied predicate P, Then X did thing A, In a specified way, Resulting in circumstance C.

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What's green and has wheels? Grass. I lied about the wheels.

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So there's this bigass moose, and it goes in the store and it asks the lady bitch "where the potatoes at" and the lady bitch says "down aisle 5" so the moose goes down to isle 5 and there aint no potatoes.

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Why did the chicken cross the road it didn't, it was hit by a bus.

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how many dead babys can fit in a bathtub 17

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Whats worse than an old guy? An old woman!

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Why did the leper go back into the shower? he missed a spot.

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Recent US presidents (and their accompanying economy)

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What eats McDonalds for breakfast, lunch and dinner, annoys everyone around them, and could care less about anyone but themselves? The population of the United States.

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How did Muhammed Ali get into Professional Boxing? With a lot of hard work and dedication.

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Why doe this filthy bitch take big dildos inside himself? Because he is gay.

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Three men walk into a bar. Neither of them saw it coming

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How many Jews does it take to change a light bulb? Generally one, however, in cases where the light fixture is unusually high, a ladder may be necessary. Some people like having a second person hold the ladder as they climb it. In this unconventional circumstance, it would take precisely two Jews to change a lightbulb. Also, Jews are bad people.

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What does this and this have in common , wait I was meant to put pictures up, aww

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Why did alfred crap his pants? because he had downs

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What do you call two Mexicans playing basketball? Good friends enjoying a summer activity.

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Imagine: You are trapped in a prizon cell with no doors, no windows, no furniture and completely sealed in with nothing. What do you do? Stop imagining!

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Q: How many banana peels does it take to run down the street, true or false? A: Telephone poles don't have doors.

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Poop

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Q: What's the difference between a vampire and a lawyer? A: A lot of things.

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What's easier to get than a broke prostitute on the side of the street? Osama Bin Laden.

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An old bear-wrestler dies and finds himself at the pearly gates. Confused and at a loss for words due to the unfamiliar circumstance and lack of public toilets, he blurts out "Saint Peter, I presume?" but it was just the train conductor. "Ticket please." He searched his pockets and finally found the ticket. He wished he had a dog, but not a seeing-eye dog because people would assume he was blind. This story illustrates the importance of situational awareness, remembering which pocket you put your ticket in, and not forgetting to go before you leave because you don't know when you'll be able to find a restroom.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops