Knock Knock? Who's there? Dr. Fishbourne Dr. Fishbourne? Yea, I've come to inform you that your son has committed suicide due to lack of parental care and love.

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How do you determine the population of mexico? Send out a census every 4 years.

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if x marks the spot, what does y do? y does the laundry.

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Why did Sam have no friends? Because he was dead.

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Whats funny about ISIS? Nothing, you asshole, its terrifying.

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Q: What is black, white, and red all over? A: A nun in a blender.

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A little boy started choking on a condom. His father came and was in a great panic. "Please don't leave me. I don't want to lose you!" he cried over and over again. Then his wife came in and said "it's alright darling, there's plenty more in the drawer". "Oh, thank God for that, I thought I lost it there!" dad replied.

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What can you eat that comes in all different flavors. Chex mix, I bet you thought it was women but its not its chex mix

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whats worse then a baby with out floaties?.......beating your grandma to death with a puppy

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Why did little Tommy sink to the bottom of the pool? He had no arms.

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Q: what did 7 say to 11? A: weres every one else?

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A black man walks into a bar. A few minutes later a jewish man enters. Next door, a twelve year old girl is crying over the tragic death of her mother due to terminal cancer.

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What did the computer say to the other computer? Nothing, computers can't talk

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What do you call a gay man who has sex with a woman? A bisexual.

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I like my women like I like my coffee. Without a penis

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whats worse than 1 bee sting? 2 bee stings. whats worse than 2 bee stings? 3 beestings

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the car? Get in the car.

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How do you kill a 6'5 black man in a dark alley? Stab him 3 times in the appendix with a 12 inch blade.

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Wanna hear a joke? Women's rights

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A priest a rabbi and an iman are stuck in the desert. After walking for days without rescue or civilisation in sight, and rapidly running out of food and water, they decide to each pray to their respective gods for rescue, and in doing so solve the ultimate question of which religion is the true religion. They all die.

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- Knock knock - I have a doorbell

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Why can't T-rex give hih fives, Because they're dead...

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An American man and a Chinese man have a conversation. The American man asks the Chinese man after a couple of minutes of speaking, "How long have you lived in the United States?" The Chinese man replies, "I moved to the United States when I was ten years old."

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what do black men and vending machines have in common? neithier work and they both steal your money

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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