Q) what do girls like long , soft (can go hard) and has white stuff come out A) Twinkies but if left out of its plastic wrapping for a long period of time it will go hard

there are 2 black guys and a spanish guy in a car. who is driving? a sober, US citizen over the age of 16

What if I told you that our role our "little team" is not as little as you think?

Yeah, just went for more ice, its hot as hell here, and yeah its the weather, I dont mind you using valium, is that the same as Xanax? My mum uses it sometimes, she is afraid of heights and well, has to fly a lot so its complicated, if you dont mind, I have always wanted to know more about you so shall we?

Your mamma is so fat that she went on a diet.

The police, we have several warrants for your arrest.

How do you make someone feel stupid? You throw a smart person at them

whats small and has four hoofs? A sow

How do you wake up your snoring friend? Cut his feet off.

What did the man say when he was hit with a flying watermelon? Ouch.

Poop

Do you know whats not funny black jokes that arent racist. You belendo!!!

imagine a world without santa ill make it easy, lookout the window

Chuck Norris walks into a bar. Everybody leaves except Michael Jackson. Michael Jackson never walked out alive

I was purple once. I took a shower later that day.

roses are gray violets are gray everything's gray I'm a #$%ing dog

What happened to boy who fell down the stairs? He died. What happened to the girl who fell down the same stairs? The boy who fell down the stairs hit her down the stairs too and they both died What happened to the man fell down these very same stairs? He got peer pressure and committed suicide.

HOLY SHIT BITCH!!!

Why is it that many lawyers have broken noses? Because they often have to interact with violent and distrustful criminals.

Why was Martin Luther King Jr. Shot? Because he was black.

Why was the lemon not feeling well? Because it had lemon aids.

-What do you call a pyromaniac on a golf course? *** I backed over your cat. -A FIREHAZ- wait what?

why does'nt mexico have an olympic team? because they have a poor economy and have other things to worry about.

PFF! I hate that shit XD not saying that claymation cant be art, but that Plonsters or whatever is just something I dragged out of my head.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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