patty was in sunday school, the teacher asked her "patty who created the universe?" john sliped into the seat next to her and jabbed her with a pen "LORD ALMIGHTY" the teacher said' good patty now who gave himself for us? john again jabbed her with a pin "JESUS CHRIST" "that very good patty now what did mary say to joseph after they had their 23 child?" john jabbed her " IF YOU STICK THAT DAMN THING IN ME ONE MORE TIME ILL BREAK IT IN HALF!!!" the teacher fainted

What's worse than finding a worm in Your apple?? A pile of dead babies

What's megan fox's bra size? Wait I got a fb notification brb!

I got shot once it hurt a lot

Why does the Anti-Joke site suck? Because it's not funny.

Your momma is so fat, that her doctor recommended that she goes on a diet in order to prevent early death caused by a heart problem.

I have a good knock knock joke: You start it.

Why do black people like fried chicken? There's cocaine inside.

so there are two muffins in an oven. one muffin says to the other muffin, "hey is it hot in here or is it just me?" the other muffin says, "holy sh*t your a talking muffin."

A snake walks into a bar

A white straight man, a black gay man, and an Asian bisexual woman walk into a bar. They are enjoying their drinks until one overly intoxicated man makes a remark towards the group in reference to their diversity in race, sexual orientation, and sex. The bar crowd is enthused with the drunk man's genius in not only constructing a joke to cover all three categorical descriptions of the group, but in guessing each member's sexuality based on their respective appearances.

Hi

A list of comebacks: Hows ur face nancy grace ur mom ur face ur moms face take it to my butt, cuz ur the only one that gives a crap

what do you call a baby that's just been crushed by a piano. a mess for a cleaner to deal with. think about his health. after that he might get a disease from the body and he might not get to sleep as it is a haunting sight.

hit the thumbs down button

Roses are red Violets are blue... No they are not they come in many different colors from cross breeding and different environments.... YOU ARE WRONG

How do you kill a cow while your carrying a gun Shoot him

What did the umpire yell to the flatulent player at bat? FOUL BOWEL!

women's rights

Knock-knock. Who's there? Doorbell repairman

What do you call a black man with a well paid job? A sucess and a credit to himself and his family

What's pink and wrinkley and hangs out your pj's? Ya nanna :)

One day i had to piss. I went to the bathroom.

What did Freddie Mercurys father say at Freddies funeral. "Thats the cleanest hole our Freddies ever been in".

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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