A) Knock Knock. B) Who's There? A) Me. B) Oh, well I'm in the shower, just give me five minutes. A) OK, I'll wait in the kitchen, is it cool if I heat up a hot pocket? B) Yeah sure, just not the pepperoni one, I only have one left and I was saving it for lunch. A) Alright.

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Q: Why didnt the irishman walk out of the bar? A: He died of severe alchoholism and had a heart attack and died istantly

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A welsh guy walks into a pub. This something any average guy would do.

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What did one wall say to the other? Walls don't talk.

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Terrorist jokes make me explode with laughter.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I'm a schizophrenic, And so am I.

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Q: What do you call a dog with no legs? A: Doesn't matter, he's not coming

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what colour is a frog green you idiot

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Becuse 7 was a convicted serial killer. >----->

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What was the little boy doing in the deep end of the swimming pool? Drowning.

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Yourrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr soo uglyyyyyy

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A woman walks into a bar. She gets hit on by every guy in the bar. After hours of being hit on she finally has enough and asks the guys to stop. The guys Say "ok im sorry". She leaves.

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once upon a time, a bird fell in love with a fish.. they both died.

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What's the difference between a catholic priest and acne? Acne waits until the boys hit puberty before coming on their face.

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There was an Englishman, an Irishman and a chest of drawers. The Englishman put a flask of coffee in the top drawer without even looking. Diane hates wrestling.

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What isn't funny? The holacost.

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Why couldn't Larry walk his dog? Larry doesn't have a dog.

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What is purple and crawls? A wounded grape.

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terry stockton is straight

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I see London, I see France, I am in an airplane on my way to Europe.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have ADHD, Oh look a butterfly...

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Whats the best way to get chewing gum out of your hair? Cancer.

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A Rabbi, A Priest and an Imam walk into a bar. The Imam doesn't order a drink because it is strictly against his religious beliefs.

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How many jews can you fit in a car? That depends on the volume of the car and the size of the people involved - different cars are of different sizes and can fit a different number of people. For instance, you could probably fit more than 20 midget jews in a van but you could probably not fit as many overweight jews in a coupé. However if you put some effort into getting as many standard sized people, in this case jews for reasons unknown, into a standard size sedan you should be able to fit about seven or eight in the car itself and one in the trunk, making a total of nine or ten.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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