Your mom is so fat that she saw a school bus full of white children and , thought "I can hardly even remember a time when my body used to be slim." She now keeps track of her diet and exercises regularly,the result of this has been a weight loss of over 95 pounds.

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I watched The Pianist last night? Holocaust

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Sandusky went from Penn State, to the State Penn.

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As Vanilla Ice once said, "If there's a problem ill resolve it."

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My nieghbor is blonde, but she doesnt like corn dogs or anything of that sort because her boyfriend is mexican. Mexcans are banned from eating corn dogs because they illegally crossed the border. Her dog wieghs about 8.9485763 pounds. Her nieghbor also protests corndogs because she cant fit throught her customized door which was 39 feet long. Why was six afraid of seven? because that lady is 700 pounds.

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Why did the Jew fall off a cliff? Someone pushed him

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Q: What's black and white, and red all over ? A: A penguin in a blender.

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why is the asian still in the driveway? her car broke down

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A man walks into a bar and gets drunk. He then goes home and proceeds beating his many wives in a drunken fit of rage.

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Why should you be concerned when you see a mexican riding a bike? because he probably wasnt wearing a helmet

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What do you call Santa's helpers? Chinese factory workers, who live in impoverished conditions, work up to 16 hours a day, earning slave wages. God damn you, Steve Jobs and Mattel.

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This is my first attempt at making an anti-joke: That's was it.

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How do you stop a black person from drowning?.. Take your foot off his head

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I'm asking, really... ..come on, someone has to know...

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How do you confuse a blonde? Very carefully.

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Why did the girl commit suicide? She has been abused severely for seven years by her pet kangaroo.

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Knock knock. ... ... *after waiting 30 seconds or so to no answer, the knocker concludes there is no one home and decides to go home to take his son to soccer practice and work on his taxes, and maybe call his mother to see how her foot surgery went* Who's there? Oh.. This is awkward, I forgot why I was here in the first place. I have to go. Bye.

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A woman is home washing her dishes when she suddenly slips banging her head on a cabinet. She passed out for a few seconds, then woke to find a great gash on her left cheek, fairly spurting blood. At the emergency room, the doctor asks, "How did this happen?" The woman replied, "My boy friend tried to drown me."

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What do you get when you cross a Mexican, a black guy and an octopus? I don't know but I don't like it.

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Why was little billy sad? He had a crouton stuck up his asshole.

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What do you get when you combine Seth Rogen and Harrison Ford? A very risky and expensive medical experiment.

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if chuck norris had 5 dollars and you had 10 dollars you would have 5 dollars more than Chuck Norris

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Why did the man take off all his clothes? He was going to take a shower.

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A fish finds that his fishbowl is on fire. He escapes the bowl only to realize he is equally screwed.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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