Roses are red, Violets are blue, Sausage is brown, and so is my wife.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Why did I get raped

thumb_up thumb_down -22

What did the umpire yell to the flatulent player at bat? FOUL BOWEL!

thumb_up thumb_down -22

We didnt star the fire ...........

thumb_up thumb_down -24

What looks like half an apple? The other half.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Q: Why did the policeman stare at the big-breasted victim? A: She was dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

What did the prostitute say to the nun? It's nice to see you again, Sister.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Waiter! What's this fly doing in my soup? It isn't doing anything, sir. It's dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Why is a jewish man so tall? Genetics

thumb_up thumb_down -24

How did they wake up Lady Gaga? They p-p-poked her face p-p-poked her face......!

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Dubstep < Music

thumb_up thumb_down -26

How do you make someone cry Take all of their belongings

thumb_up thumb_down -28

Roses are red, violets are blue, I don't like anyone who is not a straight, white male.

thumb_up thumb_down -28

Q) How do you get 100 midgets into a Mini? A)You have to manufacture a Mini large enough to accommodate 100 midgets. It wouldn't be street-legal, but at least the problem of getting 100 midgets into a Mini is solved. Q) Did you hear about the two guys who wanted to go to Paris? A) They didn't go! Q) Why did the boy throw his Television out the window? A) Cause it was completely broken. Q. What's the difference between a duck? A. An orange. Q: What is red and smells like blue paint? A: Red paint. Q) What did the Hobo get for Xmas? A) Nothing Q) How do you get 100 midgets into a Mini? A)You have to manufacture a Mini large enough to accommodate 100 midgets. It wouldn't be street-legal, but at least the problem of getting 100 midgets into a Mini is solved. Q) Did you hear about the two guys who wanted to go to Paris? A) They didn't go! Q) Why did the boy throw his Television out the window? A) Cause it was completely broken. Q. What's the difference between a duck? A. An orange. Q: What is red and smells like blue paint? A: Red paint. Q) What did the Hobo get for Xmas? A) Nothing Q) How do you get 100 midgets into a Mini? A)You have to manufacture a Mini large enough to accommodate 100 midgets. It wouldn't be street-legal, but at least the problem of getting 100 midgets into a Mini is solved. Q) Did you hear about the two guys who wanted to go to Paris? A) They didn't go! Q) Why did the boy throw his Television out the window? A) Cause it was completely broken. Q. What's the difference between a duck? A. An orange. Q: What is red and smells like blue paint? A: Red paint. Q) What did the Hobo get for Xmas? A) Nothing Q) How do you get 100 midgets into a Mini? A)You have to manufacture a Mini large enough to accommodate 100 midgets. It wouldn't be street-legal, but at least the problem of getting 100 midgets into a Mini is solved. Q) Did you hear about the two guys who wanted to go to Paris? A) They didn't go! Q) Why did the boy throw his Television out the window? A) Cause it was completely broken. Q. What's the difference between a duck? A. An orange. Q: What is red and smells like blue paint? A: Red paint. Q) What did the Hobo get for Xmas? A) Nothing

thumb_up thumb_down -28

hi. thats what she said.

thumb_up thumb_down -30

What did one black guy say to the other black guy? I haven't thought of it yet....

thumb_up thumb_down -30

Why can't Helen Keller drive a car? Because she's dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

how do you know your at a gay picnic. the hotdogs smell like shit.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

What did one German man say to the other? Wo ist das Badezimmer?

thumb_up thumb_down -32

knock knock WUUUZZZZZUUUUUUUUP!!!!! WUUUUZZZZZUUUUUUUP!!! WUUZZZZUUUUUUUUP!!! WUUZUUUUUUUUUUUUUUP!! WUUUUUZZZZUU......

thumb_up thumb_down -32

What will you never see? A white guy that camp jump.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

Why did the chicken cross the road To get to the other side

thumb_up thumb_down -32

Did you hear about the big Polish tragedy? There was a power outage in Poland's busiest shopping mall, People were stuck on the escalators for 4 hours. A woman gave birth in the elevator and died.

thumb_up thumb_down -34

What do you do if you see a bleeding Mexican in your front yard? Quickly respond to the accident and supply the wounded victim with first aid.

thumb_up thumb_down -58

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops