A- Knock Knock B- Who's there? A- Soccer!

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A Blonde, a Jew, a Rooster, and a Mexican walk into a bar and the bartender says, "What is this? Some kind of joke?"

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What's orange and doesn't bounce? A flat basketball

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Anti-Jokes is addicting, you know what else is addicting? Heroine.

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Q: Your arms are tied and bleeding from your face, a bull is charging at you, a catapult launches a bunch of rottweilers with rabies straight at your face, a nuclear bomb right next to you is five seconds from exploding, and my teleportation device ia right next to you, what do you do? A: You start by getting your own damn teleportation device! The hell ill let you bleed on mine!

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what do gay people eat?? food

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So a woman is in the kitchen. And she makes the most delicious turkey salad for her 4 hungry children and her husband. They love Jesus

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why did the child go to hospital with 52 broken bones,lung and kidney failure,heart disease and cut off penis. because his mum threw a fridge at mikeanator_27

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How do you spell Madeleine Mccann? I A N

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It was running from its imminent death. It was being chased by a dog with a shark's head and chainsaws for legs. It was only delaying the inevitable.

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A pregnant women walks into a bar and orders a drink. The bartender denies her service because she is under the legal age.

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What three letters alter boys into men and girls into women? The letter containing their bank card, the letter containing their national insurance card and the letter accepting them into a job or higher education placement.

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Osama Bin Laden and a monk walk into a bar. Mistaken Identity. It was the Dalai Lama, Osama is dead.

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Why does smokey bears wife never have kids? Because every time she gets hot smokey beats he with a shovel

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Q: Whats the difference between a Chicken and Your Mom? A: I dont eat the chicken

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other... Uh oh. A car just ran it over.

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Why do dogs lick their balls? Why? Because they can.

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What do you call a person who uses food stamps? Poor. What do you call a black person who uses food stamps? Still poor.

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Sam alexander is also r8 g4y

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What did the doctor say to the Jew? You have cancer.

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A man and woman was sitting at a bar. The man bought the woman a roofied drink and she has never been seen again.

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hi michael

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What do you call a kid with no arms and an eye patch? Names.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's dead-

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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