Why did Billy want cancer? So he could be like his parents.

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Why is an elephant large, grey and wrinkled? Because if it was small, round and smooth it would be an aspirin.

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The cow went moo

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How do you keep children off your lawn? Molest them

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Hi.

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What is the difference between a pile of dead baby's and a Lamborghini I don't have a Lamborghini in my garage

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Why do black guys have brown skin ? Because there born that way

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What did the cop say to the people watching the house fire? All right nothing to see here jokes over

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Roses are red Violets are blue So is your face Cuz I just gagged you

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she is blind and death, making her oblivious of her surroundings and would be a danger to fellow commuters. -mac

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why did the chicken cross the road? because it had earlier escaped from its cage and had since began to wonder around the local town

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Wanna hear a funny joke? Women's rights.

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*Ring* *Ring* Bartender : Hello? Stranger:Is Mike Hunt their? Bartender: Mike Hunt! Is Mike Hunt here?! Mike Hunt: Oh thank god! I've been anticipating this phone call for a while now! I've been stranded here for hours and my wife's been killed and the killer is still out there!

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Billy comes home from playing with his friend as he walks to his front yard he comes across his mother...she is dead on the floor his friend then says "im SO sorry your mom is dead but at least you still have your dad" Billy than replies "my mom is my dad" billy then is put into a foster home and spends years trying to recover from the fact that he is the freak offspring of a hermaphrodite

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How many dead babies can fit in a bathtub. Twelve. A previous joke said seventeen, that person had their facts wrong. I know from experience

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What did the boy do when he was bored and broke? He took to the streets selling illicit drugs such as cocaine. Although dangerous, the rush from said danger solved his boredom problem. On top of this, there is a huge market for such substances and he was not broke for much longer.

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A woman should not be in the kitchen.

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What's the difference between a Duck and Michael Jackson? A Duck has feathers and goes "Quack quack" and Michael Jackson touches little boys......

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Why did the donkey fall over Because it had A diabetic foot infection and had to have a non traumatic amputation of the lower hind leg.

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R.I.P Ryan Dunn.

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What do you call a Muslim taking control of an airplane? A pilot. -Tag

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What's more addicting than a good book? Meth

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There was a white man who sat on a log. then suddenly a Chinese man popped out and said he had to leave. he left.

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An Irishman walks out of a bar...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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