Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, I was dropped on my head as a baby, kjhgfiehcgbfbjebfiuheggfcug

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LOL. It's East vs LA and Durant

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Can Helen Keller keep a secret? No, she didn't hear it in the first place

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What happened to boy who fell down the stairs? He died. What happened to the girl who fell down the same stairs? The boy who fell down the stairs hit her down the stairs too and they both died What happened to the man fell down these very same stairs? He got peer pressure and committed suicide.

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Roses are red Violets r blue My name is Dave Microwave

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A really hot girl walks past 2 guys and the following conversation is produced... Guy1:damn! look at that ass! Guy2:yep I bet shit comes from that thing! When's the last time she had diarrhea?!

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If she is under the age of 18 years old and is identified by your state as a minor, shes too young for you bro.

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A chicken cross's the road it dies when a car runs it over

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A man walks into a bar and the bartender says "Sorry sir we're closed" So the man goes: "Oh, okay. I wasn't sure if you guys were open till' 10pm tonight" and the bartender goes "No, thats only on the weekends" The man thanks the bartender and proceeded to leave the bar. He now knows the arrive earlier the following day.

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Why do they censor everything on here? Because **** **** ******* *** ***** *****.

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Howmuch wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? Anyone? I'm trying to settle a bet.

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Why did the man complain of pain in his ankle? Because several consecutive tissue samples of the area revealed a rapidly metastasizing neoplasm. Blood samples indicated the presence of what appeared to be Hodgkins Lymphoma. The man was very wealthy, however, and had world class doctors treat him. He then donated a vast portion of his wealth to research. 12% of the donated money went into studying the medicinal effects of Twinkies.

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Contrary to popular statement, "When life hands you lemons, make lemonade," you technically can't do this because of the need for water and sugar to make lemonade. Secondly, life can't technically hand you lemons because life isn't a physical thing that can hand you lemons. So really, you don't even have to worry about the second two ingredients.

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Q

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What did Batman say to Robin before the got into the Batmobile? - Come on Robin, get into the Batmobile.

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How do you put an elephant in a fridge? Open the door and put it in. How to you put a giraffe in a fridge? Open the door, take out the elephant and put in the giraffe. Simba hosts an animal convention and all the animals attend except which? The giraffe. There is an alligator infested lake. How do you cross? Swim across. All the alligator are at the convention.

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Why did the dog cross the road? He didn't, he got run over

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Why did the deer die Because Jupiter is incapable of supporting life

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Ask me if I'm a truck. Are you a truck? You have HIV.

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roses are red, violets are blue, charcoal is black, and my neighbor is too.

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Why didn't the lactose intolerant man get a drink at the bar? He was the designated driver.

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What did the blind man say to the librarian? Hello, I am looking for books that are published in braille.

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What do you call a black person that went to medical school? A doctor

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have a knife Take off your clothes

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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