When I was a kid, I had a clown at my birthday party. He molested me. Later I found out the clown was my dad.

knock knock 'who's there?' 'just open the door'

I used to walk in front of archers, but then I took an arrow to the knee.

Your not having a bad day, your just doing everything wrong!

What's there like a good neighbor? Your neighbor

Have you seen Stevie Wonder's house? Yes, but he hasn't.

What's green and has wheels? Grass, I lied about the the wheels.

What do you call a black priest? Religious.

Why did Jerry Sandusky go to the shower room? He hadn't showered all week and was beginning to smell.

There is this dylectic who can't spell.

how many aliens does it take to change a light bulb? i wouldn't know, i have never seen one and there is the off chance that they don't even exist

Why did the black man shoot someone? His wife recently left him and he got fired from his job.

Why did the mormon walk into a bar? He didn't. Mormons don't drink.

Two hunters are out in the woods when one of them collapses. He doesn't seem to be breathing and his eyes are glazed. The other guy whips out his phone and calls the emergency services. He gasps, "My friend is dead! What can I do?". The operator says "Calm down. I can help. First, let's make sure he's dead." There is a silence, then the man said "he has a pulse". The operator then calmly stated "we are sending a helicopter to air lift him out of there as we speak". The man got helicoptered to the nearest ER, and the doctors did their best to save him. He ended up having to go on life support for three years until his family members finally decided to pull the plug. The medical insurance didn't cover life support and the family went broke because of it.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side... But he got hit by a car instead, Life is full of disappointments

Why can't santa fit down a chimney? No one can

what did helen keller say when she dropped a box on her toe. nothing. helen keller cannot speak

Why did the boy miss the school bus? He died in his sleep

What did the two eggs in the frying pan say to each other? Nothing, their eggs.

Knock, Knock! Who's There? Your neighbor, I found your lost cat! Oh thanks!

What do Asians eat for dinner? Home cooked meals

68 :)

John:Why couldn't the T-Rex clay his hands? Billy:Because his arms are too small! John:no he's extinct dumbass

Roses are red Kittens are fluffy This doesn't rhyme Cupcake

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...