Your not having a bad day, your just doing everything wrong!

thumb_up thumb_down +49

What's there like a good neighbor? Your neighbor

thumb_up thumb_down +47

Have you seen Stevie Wonder's house? Yes, but he hasn't.

thumb_up thumb_down +45

"I love you terribly!" said the girl to her new boyfriend. "That's kind of ambiguous..."

thumb_up thumb_down +45

A teacher notices one of her students clutching a cat. She asks him why. The boy, tearfully, explains that he heard his father tell his mother that he was going to eat her pussy when the kids left for school. The teacher laughs and, the class being 10-11 years old thereby at an age approaching biological curiosity, decides to mix this in with a sex education video she was planning on showing them a few weeks later. She then phones the boy's parents who come to collect the cat while reassuring the boy that it is in no danger. The cat was popular with the boy's classmates and they would often go to visit him as a result. Many years later, just after the boy started attending university, the cat was put to sleep at the age of 13 due to liver cancer. The boy placed a Facebook post in honour of his feline friend, which was spotted by a former classmate of his in a routine search who happened to be attending the same university. They ended up reacquainting and beginning a sexual relationship, which was how the boy lost his virginity and eventually blossomed into a 37-year marriage resulting in three children.

thumb_up thumb_down +45

Knock Knock Who's there? Jimmy Tyler, your son Hi son *continues to open door

thumb_up thumb_down +43

how many aliens does it take to change a light bulb? i wouldn't know, i have never seen one and there is the off chance that they don't even exist

thumb_up thumb_down +43

Why did the mormon walk into a bar? He didn't. Mormons don't drink.

thumb_up thumb_down +43

Why did Jerry Sandusky go to the shower room? He hadn't showered all week and was beginning to smell.

thumb_up thumb_down +43

What do you call a black priest? Religious.

thumb_up thumb_down +43

How did the stapeler disappear? I ate it.

thumb_up thumb_down +43

What's green and has wheels? Grass. I lied about the wheels

thumb_up thumb_down +41

Q: what's red and goes up and down? A: a tomato in an elevator

thumb_up thumb_down +41

What do you call a group of white guys playing basketball in Philadelphia? Actually, that already seems like a pretty good summary of the situation.

thumb_up thumb_down +41

Bill: Did you hear someone said you sounded like an owl? Dave: Who?

thumb_up thumb_down +41

Why was the boy sad? Because he wasn't happy!

thumb_up thumb_down +39

what ya call e dong withb eyes peeneyes

thumb_up thumb_down +39

Why did the boy miss the school bus? He died in his sleep

thumb_up thumb_down +39

Knock, Knock! Who's There? Your neighbor, I found your lost cat! Oh thanks!

thumb_up thumb_down +39

roses are red violets are blue i took your cup to the bathroom ...thats not really apple juice:)

thumb_up thumb_down +37

What did the white guy say to the black guy wearing a black T-shirt? That's a very nice shirt.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

I hate when Harry Potter showers in my Potatoes....

thumb_up thumb_down +37

A squirrel walks up to a tree and says, " I forgot to store nuts for winter and now I am dead." Its funny because the squirrel gets dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

A man walks into a bar. I don't know what happened next because I was waiting outside for my friend.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops