Knock, knock (No one was home)

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What's wrong with shooting an african american? Everything, it's murder.

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What's a black person's favorite thing to eat? Food.

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The doctor said he had good news and bad news. I asked for the bad news first. He said, "You have AIDS. I asked what the good news was. He said "You will only have it about a year."

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Does it not sound kinda fun to keep slapping someone that always turns the other cheek?

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Who's gay and has buttsex? Dan.

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What's purple and eats rocks? Scientists are still looking into this question.

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Your not having a bad day, your just doing everything wrong!

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What's there like a good neighbor? Your neighbor

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"I love you terribly!" said the girl to her new boyfriend. "That's kind of ambiguous..."

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's house? Yes, but he hasn't.

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A teacher notices one of her students clutching a cat. She asks him why. The boy, tearfully, explains that he heard his father tell his mother that he was going to eat her pussy when the kids left for school. The teacher laughs and, the class being 10-11 years old thereby at an age approaching biological curiosity, decides to mix this in with a sex education video she was planning on showing them a few weeks later. She then phones the boy's parents who come to collect the cat while reassuring the boy that it is in no danger. The cat was popular with the boy's classmates and they would often go to visit him as a result. Many years later, just after the boy started attending university, the cat was put to sleep at the age of 13 due to liver cancer. The boy placed a Facebook post in honour of his feline friend, which was spotted by a former classmate of his in a routine search who happened to be attending the same university. They ended up reacquainting and beginning a sexual relationship, which was how the boy lost his virginity and eventually blossomed into a 37-year marriage resulting in three children.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Jimmy Tyler, your son Hi son *continues to open door

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how many aliens does it take to change a light bulb? i wouldn't know, i have never seen one and there is the off chance that they don't even exist

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Why did the mormon walk into a bar? He didn't. Mormons don't drink.

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Why did Jerry Sandusky go to the shower room? He hadn't showered all week and was beginning to smell.

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What do you call a black priest? Religious.

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How did the stapeler disappear? I ate it.

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What's green and has wheels? Grass. I lied about the wheels

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Q: what's red and goes up and down? A: a tomato in an elevator

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What was the little boy doing in the deep end of the swimming pool? Drowning.

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What do you call a group of white guys playing basketball in Philadelphia? Actually, that already seems like a pretty good summary of the situation.

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Bill: Did you hear someone said you sounded like an owl? Dave: Who?

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Why was the boy sad? Because he wasn't happy!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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