Why did Sam have no friends? Because he was dead.

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How many Amish people does it take to change a light bulb? None because they don't believe in technology.

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A man walks into the doctor's office and says, "Doc, every time I drink coffee, my eye hurts". The Doctor then tells him, "You have an infection called conjunctivitis, also known as pinkeye"

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crime in multi story is wrong on so many levels!

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Penis.

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What's the difference between Santa and Tiger Woods? Santa is a jolly Christmas figure that delivers presents to children and Tiger Woods is a professional golfer.

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10 years ago, i man got cancer. He recovered and now leads a normal life.

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Why did Jenny fail her photography class? Because Jenny has epilepsy and she had a coma while taking the final exam? To this day Jenny is drain dead in the hospital.

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Hello we are from the church of the latter day saints.

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A duck walk into a bar and asks the bartender for a drink. The bartender hands him a glass and the duck drinks it. After finishing his drink he ruminates about how drowning his misery with booze won't solve a thing in his life. He decided he'll call his ex-wife and apologize and goes back home.

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what is the difference between a indian and a trampoline? you take you shoes off to jump on the trampoline.

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How is the difference between a door? Its a chicken, because they don't have wheels.

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What was the little boy doing in the deep end of the swimming pool? Drowning.

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Friends are like trees. They fall down when you hit them with an ax.

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What is big and white and will kill you if it falls from a tree? My d**k.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

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How is butter and your mom similar? They both consist of much fat.

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Women's football

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How many jews can you fit in a car? That depends on the volume of the car and the size of the people involved - different cars are of different sizes and can fit a different number of people. For instance, you could probably fit more than 20 midget jews in a van but you could probably not fit as many overweight jews in a coupé. However if you put some effort into getting as many standard sized people, in this case jews for reasons unknown, into a standard size sedan you should be able to fit about seven or eight in the car itself and one in the trunk, making a total of nine or ten.

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whats green and has wheels? grass i lied about the wheels

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Q: If Jack Bauer is partially gay, then what are you? A: His sidekick -Ryan Vallee

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Whats the best way to get chewing gum out of your hair? Cancer.

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Yo momma is so ugly, she might not win the "America's next top model" contest.

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Q: What do you call a black hitchhiker? A: A hitchhiker

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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