A boy and his father are in a car crash. The father dies and the son is transported to the nearest hospital. Once there, a surgeon is brought in to operate on the boy. The surgeon steps back and says "I can't operate on this boy, I haven't had enough training for such a situation." The hospital calls in another surgeon and they are more qualified for the event. Then the surgeon wakes up and realizes the boy is in critical condition. There is blood drenching his shirt and there is only seconds to operate. Suddenly, the boy wakes up and realizes he has just survived a car crash. Suddenly Leonardo DeCaprio enters with a girl. The world turns on its side and they all wake up to find them selves a victim of Inception. Then the caterpillar wakes up and realizes it has immense mental capacity, even above those of an above-average human. Then I woke up and realized I lost my job. MLIA.

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A father teaches his son to ride a bike. Father: Don't stop or you'll fall. Son: Ok, dad. They have a nice time,

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What can Harry Potter NOT see with his glasses? His parents...alive.

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What is the funny thing about suicide? nothing...

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So horse walk into a bar. The barkeep says "Look horse. You cant be in Here. You're too big and you're going to hurt someone....Its just not gonna work out."

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What is the difference between a pile of dead baby's and a Lamborghini I don't have a Lamborghini in my garage

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Why did my penis cross the road? To get to the other vagina.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing-set? She had no arms. Knock-knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

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Why does your mother not love you anymore? Because she was in a tragic car accident 5 years ago and is now deceased and is therefore incapable of love.

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drugs sex alcohol are as funny as AIDS

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What's chris benoit doing? Just hangin in the gym

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Why does Polly want a cracker? Because meth is too intense.

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Why did Doris want to father children? Because she wanted to have a fry-up with the leftover baby oil

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What's black on top and white on bottom? Rape.

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Knock Knock Who's there I have Alzheimer's I have Alzheimer's who? Knock Knock

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Q:What did I get for Christmas? A:You, put on this leash.

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why do they call it history? Women didn't do shit

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roses are red violets are blue count my five damn finger , and the third one is for you!!!!!!!!

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A zombie walks into a bar. It was shot by an M16 automatic rifle. The video game had zombies.

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what long hard and in a tight hole? a penis in a vagina

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A man walks into a bar. He is then taken to the hospital for his concussion, seeing as the bar was made of metal

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What's cooler than being cool? Being really cool

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Why does a snake have eyes? To see!

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if life gives you lemons...chuck them back and say i wanted muffins instead!!!!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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