whats cold and in a box...have a guess

What's the difference between a murcielago and a dead baby ? I don't have a dead baby in my garage. 8-)

what do you call a bear on a unicycle? improbable.

Your mother is so fat that she has diabetes

Two men and a woman jump out of a plane. They forgot their parachutes and all died.

My neighbor's kid was running around yelling magical spells. I said "Wow, you really want to be like Harry Potter, don't you?". He said "Yes!". So, I killed his parents and locked him under the stairs.

What do you call nacho cheese? Stolen.

Tommy got hit by a truck Knock knock Whos there Not tommy

What"s the biggest Jenga game? 9/11

You best friend has a bladder disease. You ask him how he got it. He says " I was watching the superbowl and had to go, but I didn't want to miss the commercials. So it was either watching the game and getting a bladder disease that would end up killing me or going to the bathroom . Now you know where i went wrong."

why can't Hellen Keller hear? she is deaf.

whats water and frozen? an ice cube

Knock knock Who's there? Johnny Johnny who? Names don't matter. Now shut up and let me in before I kill your family

It smells like triangles in here.

Roses are red, violets are blue my name is clearance, and i have to poo

A woman walks into a bar and orders a pint of ale. "Are you a Lesbian?", joked the barman. "Yes", replied the woman.

Why did the toast land butter side down. The devil visited earth that day and therefore everything that could go wrong did.

whydid the little boy drown? he can't swim

A man who was clearly tired and worn out enters a bar. The bartender says "Long night, eh?" The man responds "Yes, very. I was with my girlfriend." The bartender says in response "Well I'm sure that was a fun time, if you know what I'm sayin." "No, not really" says the man. Little did the bartender know, the man's girlfriend was a dominatrix.

Did the Chicken cross the road? No the road moved the chicken across.

Knock Knock Knock Knock Knock Knock The person who lives inside is depth.

What has two thumbs and is very pale? A dead baby.

What did the doctor say when he lost his glasses? Where are my glasses?

The Sentence Below is True The Sentence Above is False

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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