Why cant Jesus play rugby? Cause he's nailed to a cross

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Why did Sally fall off the swing set? Because she had no arms. A: Knock knock! B: Who's there? A: Not Sally.

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wnba

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how many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop? 1027

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Where did Ellen go after the explosion? Everywhere

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Little Jimmy was afraid, and didn't like Santa Claus. So one Christmas Eve, he poured rat poison in Santa's milk. Little Jimmy no longer has parents.

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A blind guy was reading the newspaper, it said flying cars. I bet he did'nt see that coming!

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William Wright. 8 perry street Answer-Gay

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Q: Little black thing with a little red thing on it. What is it?! A: Ant with a broken nose...

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whats green and has wheels? grass i lied about the wheels

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What did the boy with no arms get for christmas? heart worms

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I was purple once. I took a shower later that day.

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Why did Simon drown? Simon couldn't swim.

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friends are like potatoes you eat them they die

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Two Atheists walk into a bar. A nearby Christian notices this fact and proceeds to slightly preach to both of the Atheists. They then kindly explain that they don't personally believe in God, but respect the Christian's opinion. They all order drinks, and become very close friends, engaging in a long, hateless conversation.

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Hey i just met you and this is crazy Get in the van

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Why did the Mexican cross the road? To get home.

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Ding dong... Knocking hurts.

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Hey I just met you, and this is crazy, but I'm your stalker, welcome to my deserted warehouse.

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- I did your mom last night! - Thanks, Dad.

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why did the girl like d1ck? because d1ck was a nice boy

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What's the difference between a jew and a boyscout? A boyscout comes back from camp.

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If I could change one thing about the alphabet, knd stte bporw xzuor flllle !

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An Octopus walks into a bar and sees that there are multiple people with instruments. The man with the Guitar says "I bet you cant play the Guitar better than Led Zeplin?" So the Octopus plays and he is better than Led Zeplin. Then the man with the Piano says "I bet you can't play the piano better than Elton John?" So the Octopus Plays it better than Elton John. The Last man from Scotland says " i bet you can't plat the bagpipes better than me?" So... The Octopus is playing around with the Bagpipes and they say to him "Hurry Up!" and the Octopus says "Shut up, I'm trying to have sex with it but first I need to get it's pajamas off" (Bagpipes have 8 long things you blow into and they have a pattern that looks like a pajama pattern) hahaha

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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