Why don't men ask for directions? They want to appear knowledgeable and strong. Asking for directions is sometimes considered a sign of weakness.

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how do u make a sausage roll push it down a hill

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Knock knock Who's there? Sergeant Sergeant who? Sergeant John Clancy. I regret to inform you that Billy your son has just unfortunately been killed in the electronic fan factory in which he works.

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What's my name? I don't know i was asking u.

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Thanks

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"Media Zombies" Sounds like the Nero I remember.

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Roses Are Red, Violets Are Blue, My Heart Skips A Beat, When I Think Of You! :D

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Two muffins are baking in an oven. The muffins do not talk or move, because they not living.

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven had a serious alcohol problem that gave him violent tendencies.

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a man walks into a bar he is promtly escorted out due to the fact that he wanted to kill the bars owner. The man got life in prison with no chance of parole. This mans name was Michael Myers.

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Q: Why was 2 afraid of 3? A: Cause 3 4 5!

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What's yellow and if it gets in your eye, you'll die? a yellow train.

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A black man found chicken on the floor. He ate it.

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timmy: a duck walks up to a lemon stand and says to the man running the stand hey... Paul: what r u talking about its duck it can't talk

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Wanna hear a funny joke? Women's rights.

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viki has 10 penises around her she eats 8 of them what does viki have? viki has AIDS

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Once, one man had a horse. And the horse had nothing against it

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How did the blonde get blood on her Ipad? A terrible paper cut.

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Two guys walk into a bar; A Mexican and a Canadian. The Mexican guy says "Bartender, give me a 2 shots of Tequila, por favor". The Canadian guy says "Bartender, give me a shot of Club and a Molson, eh". They continue to drink until neither can feel the crippling pain of their mundane lives - then they each leave the bar, walk home and sleep alone.

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Penis in a butthole. Consentual Sex.

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Your mother called last night. She wants her recipe back.

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What did Tarzan say when the monkeys came over the hill? Hey look, the monkeys are coming over the hill.

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Billy comes home from playing with his friend as he walks to his front yard he comes across his mother...she is dead on the floor his friend then says "im SO sorry your mom is dead but at least you still have your dad" Billy than replies "my mom is my dad" billy then is put into a foster home and spends years trying to recover from the fact that he is the freak offspring of a hermaphrodite

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's dead

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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