why couldn't the old man play basketball? he lacked the physical dexterity, had asthma, and had no arms.

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What did the man say when he was having sex with his wife? Nothing. It turns out it wasn't his wife, he was cheating on her with his mistress, the woman he was having sex with now, thus destroying their marriage.

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Is this the Krusty Krab? No, this is Patrick

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A cow walks into a store. The clerk asks "how may i help you sir?" The cow says "Im a cow stupid!" and storms out.

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Chuck norris survived rapture.

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I like my women like I like my coffee, I don't like coffee.

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Why did the monkey follow the tree? Because it was dead.

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knock knock? whos there? eatmop. eatmopwho? HAHAHAH EAT MY POO

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How do you make a baby float? Take your foot of its head.

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An blind orphan in an impoverished Irish village develops both AIDS and terminal cancer. You laughed a little at that. You are going to hell.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he obviously had to attend to his planned schedule which involved a meeting which was to take place on the opposite side of the road.

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anti jokes

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How are you? Yes

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Roses are ??red Vilotes are ????blue I am single and now so are u???? no go move on I don't need u I have some weed and I'm willing to kill u

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Q: Why do Japanese people have eyes that look like they're stretched to the side of their head? A: When they are born, they come out head first, and their eyes are stretched to the side of their head and are stuck in that position due to the sticky, glue like substance found inside a woman's stomach.

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The same girl who got cancer for christmas had a birthday soon after, as a present She got kimo...but it failed

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Knock, knock Who's there? You're adopted...

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What happened to the guy that stuck his finger up his asshole? It felt GOOOOOOODD

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Hey look! Where? Above you, get the rebound.

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A white man and a black man were walking down the street. The black borrowed the white man's phone to make a quick call when an incoming call came in. The black man, while trying to hand the phone back, says, "Here, it's your Dad." The white man replies, "No, that's my phone." Amazed at how uneducated the black man was.

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Knock knock? Who's there? To. To who? To WHOM.

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What do you call 10,000 black men with their heads sticking out of the ground? Afro-turf

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Why did the elephant fall out of the tree Because the post man threw a fridge at it

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what do you say to a black man with a Porsche? "hey man, i like your car."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops