Dylan Hodge likes to lick his mums penis to sleep every night.

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What did the squirrel say to the owl? Nothing, because owls and squirrels don't talk, but the owl ate the squirrel because it's a bird of prey.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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What's worse than getting hit by an arrow in the knee? Being kidnapped for 10 years and finally getting free only to find out your whole family was murdered by the person who kidnapped you.

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What was the little boy doing in the deep end of the swimming pool? Drowning.

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knock knock. Who's there? Jehovah's witness. *Door Locks*

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What do you call a guy being followed by about 30 others with high powered rifles? A military general serving for his country.

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A woman walks into a bar. She gets hit on by every guy in the bar. After hours of being hit on she finally has enough and asks the guys to stop. The guys Say "ok im sorry". She leaves.

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A blind man walks into a bar

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue Im Really Stoned And you have met with a terrible fate haven't you?

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Why did the child step on a ball?

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HAHA SO ONE TIME... The man could not finish his story because he gets shot, and is mourned for years. His daughter was watching it all. She then jumped. And fell. And broke her knee. And then died. yeah

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What is the different between a blonde and a rock? nothing.

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How do you kill a dinosaur? You don't. It's already dead.

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What do you call 200 black men jumping from a plane? Night

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why did the mans hair start to get shorter the barber was shaving it!

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Why was poor justin killed His mother kicked him into a pool of blood-thirsty aligators.

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A black man walks into a bar. A few minutes later a jewish man enters. Next door, a twelve year old girl is crying over the tragic death of her mother due to terminal cancer.

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Frog-why did the chicken cross the road Chicken-dont judge me...

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The Holocaust

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Two strippers are out of work. So they turn to prostitution.

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What's funnier than a rock. A funny rock.

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Why couldn't JImmy walk to school? A:Jimmy is in a wheelchair.

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Why did Patrick cross the road Because he saw a rock

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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