Why did Thomas miss school? Because he was sick

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Knock Knock? Who's There? Michael Jackson. Michael Jackson who? Shut up and give me ma dam candy women!

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Turn around.

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A Frenchman an Italian and an American were setting in a bar drinking and talking. The Frenchman said he made love to his wife five times last night. She said if I died she would never get married again. The Italian said said he made love to his wife ten times last night and that she said if he ever died she would kill her self. They asked the American how many times he made love to his wife last night. He said I'm a widower. She died in the 9/11 attacks.

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What happened to truck full of watermelons careening down the hill? After panicking, the driver was able to gain composure, and shifting the truck into a lower gear, was able to deliver the track safely to the side of the road at the bottom of the ill, where he sat down alongside of the road under the shade of an apple tree, sucking on delicious watermelon.

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Hi! This is Richard Young, I'll take it from here Ms.Mcgruder, lets find a quiet place to talk about this, e.c. at 5:00 p.m. tomarrow.

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Knock knock! Who's there? Alzheimer's. Alzheimer's who? Knock knock!

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A black man accidentally walks into a white man. They apologize to each other and carry on with the rest of their day.

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Bird jokes are not funny! Crow up!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It had the utmost desire to.

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What did the woman do when her husband told her to make him a sandwich? She made him a sandwich promptly.

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What do you call a man wearing a costume similar to a stereotypical ghost? A mentally disabled man on halloween.

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Ryan Chang is funny.

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Q. Why did the Mexican have to go back to Mexico? A. His mom died in an auto accident and no one in her village could afford to organize a proper funeral.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. I have Tourette's, Cheese on toast.

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There once was a man from Nantucket who had an affinity for wicker furniture.

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Want to hear a tough toung twister? spoons

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1500 Jews were ordered to walk along a straight path whilst in the midst of a blizzard. How close did they ever get to the end? What end? They marched until every last bit of their rotten flesh was driven from their weak bodies. --ZeNaziGermanDoctor

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Why is the little boy crying on the side of the street? He fell and skinned his knee.

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Why is there world hunger? Because you touch yourself at night.

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Q: What is black and hangs from a tree? A: Kevin Towers

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Two guys walk into a bar, they are both alchoholics and beat their wives.

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What's green and has wheels? Green cars.

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Old McDonald had a farm But due to the lack of government subsidies, he was unable to make his mortgage payments, causing the bank to foreclose on his property.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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