What did the vapyre eat for dinner? Nothing, they dont exist.

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Why did the bird fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? Because he was stapled to the bird

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Whats red and smells like blue paint? Red paint.

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potatoes

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What's Pink And Fluffy? Pink Fluff.

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whats round and like a ball a ball

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Knock knock! Who's there? This. This who? This joke.

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How did the comedian end his show with a bang? He shot 4 people in the audience. It was a horrible sight and the remainder of the people in the audience were scarred for life.

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When I see Debra walking her dog in the morning I often ask myself whose walking who!?

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How do you wake up Lady Gaga? "Poker Face"

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Why did the boy die while brushing his teeth? The toothbrush wasn't water-proof.

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Yo mama so fat,we are all very concerned for her health.

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A woman walks into a bar. She gets hit on by every guy in the bar. After hours of being hit on she finally has enough and asks the guys to stop. The guys Say "ok im sorry". She leaves.

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Why did the monkey fall off his tricycle? He got hit by a fridge.

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a b c d e f g h i j k l m n o q r s t u v w x y z i left out p.

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Why did the house burn down? Because I set it on fire.

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What do you call a woman who has one leg that's shorter than the other? Asymmetrical.

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What did the girl say to the boy? I don't know it was a private conversation

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p p p penis. penis's are big and juicy

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Knock Knock! Who's there? Penis... Okay...

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A dentist, a librarian, a construction worker, a gynecologist, a zookeeper, a shoemaker, a terrorist, a politician, a cyclist, a truck driver, a kangaroo, a Mexican, a blonde, a Jewish black guy, a Honda Civic, a monkey, a penguin, an FBI agent, a stock broker, a president of a foreign country, a CEO of a very wealthy company regarding AIDS, a founder of one of top downloaded apps in the market, a chief executive, a cook, a waitress, a priest, a nun, a little boy, a fairy, a dinosaur, and a skeleton walks into a bar. There's no punchline.

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What did the general say before the soldiers got in the tank? Get in the tank

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Penis

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Why didn't the skeleton go to th party? Because he was dead.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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