Person One: Three bears are eating tacos, seventeen bears are making margaritas, how many bears are going to the supermarket to get overly prices expired two percent milk? Person Two: ...Who gives a shit!!!!!!!!?!?!?!?!!!? Person One: No! That is incorrect!..................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................its 16

what do you call a guy that has a mouth, but cannot speak? a poor freshman who has been commanded by a Senior not to speak.

What's black and hangs from tree's? A suicidal black man.

what happens when a girl poops? she wipes her butt.

What did one black guy say to the other black guy? I haven't thought of it yet....

Christians pornstars.

Customer: Can I have a tin of red paint, please? Shop owner: I'm sorry sir, we only have yellow paint left. Customer: That's ok, I have my bike with me.

What happened when the joke was bad? crippled up like cancer of the eye

Want to hear a joke about my penis? Nevermind it's too long.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Well no one really knows for sure

*knock knock "there's a door bell"

knock knock who's there? a murder who? a murder who kills you and your family.

Knock knock GET OUTTA HERE! Jesus Christ dude I just came for some eggs!....

two guys walk into a bar, the third one ducks.

That awkward moment when the moment is awkward.

a man walked into a bar "ouch"

What do you call a tall midget? Well tall is a relative term so a midget may be considered tall compared to something or someone shorter. Say if a midget was compared to a baby he/she would be considered tall, considering the baby's small height. However midgets are looked at short by most people who are taller than them because of their physical problem that they can do nothing about.

Q: Why did Sally fall off the swing? A: She had no arms. Knock, knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

what did the man see in the mirror? Nothing, he was blind.

My wife crashed the car while listening to Adele last night. She ended up rolling in the jeep.

Why did Coolio appear in the joke below? He did not, he was not for real at this particular situation... Well It was actually a typo because some douchebag told me Coolio sang that song and I forgot to change the name after finding the truth... Moral: YOU CANT HANDLE THE TRUTH!

Canada

Why did the black man shoot someone? His wife recently left him and he got fired from his job.

Roses are red-ish Violets are blue-ish If it weren't for Jesus we'd all be jewish

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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