How is butter and your mom similar? They both consist of much fat.

What is big and white and will kill you if it falls from a tree? My d**k.

What did the homeless kid get for Christmas? Hypothermia.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

How many jews can you fit in a car? That depends on the volume of the car and the size of the people involved - different cars are of different sizes and can fit a different number of people. For instance, you could probably fit more than 20 midget jews in a van but you could probably not fit as many overweight jews in a coupé. However if you put some effort into getting as many standard sized people, in this case jews for reasons unknown, into a standard size sedan you should be able to fit about seven or eight in the car itself and one in the trunk, making a total of nine or ten.

i joined the nazis... but 2 days later i found out i am a jew

Women's football

AVB

why did tom drop his ice cream he didn't because he had no icecream

Knock. Knock Who's there? Jim. Jim who? Jim your best friend.

Have you ever met a black man who wasn't good at basketball? I have, quite regularly.

What does an Irishman order at the bar?? A beer

A plane carrying an Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman is destined to crash unless some weight is lost. First they drop the spare engine, but there is still too much weight. Then they drop the luggage, but still there is too much weight. All three men then jump out. The plane crashes anyway.

whats the difference between a joke and the holocaust? ...There both funny..Exept for the Holocaust.

Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

What's the difference between your dog and your mother? Your dog doesn't think you're a disgrace to the family

Hey I had a wet and dirty dream about you last night. Really? What happened? You got hit by a bus and I pissed myself laughing. .......

a fat black man walks into an aquarium he was quickly shot down because he was mistaken for a whale.

Blonde Entrepeneurs

Where did the 5 gay guys go? One direction

A black guy WALKS out of prison.

Two scientists walk into a bar. The first scientist says, "I'll have some H2O." The second scientist says, "I'll have H2O too." The bartender gives them both water, realizing that H2O2 is poisonous and that the second scientist must have simple worded his request poorly.

Roses are red Violets are blue In Soviet Russia They had communism

Knock knock. "Who's there?" I am deaf. "I am deaf who?" What?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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