Your mother is so fat that I'm starting to worry about her health.

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Why cant Jesus play rugby? Cause he's nailed to a cross

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Why did Simon drown? Simon couldn't swim.

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Two Atheists walk into a bar. A nearby Christian notices this fact and proceeds to slightly preach to both of the Atheists. They then kindly explain that they don't personally believe in God, but respect the Christian's opinion. They all order drinks, and become very close friends, engaging in a long, hateless conversation.

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William Wright. 8 perry street Answer-Gay

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I'm so hungry I feel I would be able to ingest large quantities of food.

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Want to hear a dirty joke? A horse fell in the mud.

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Women's rights.

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What's brown, dirty, and smells like feces? Feces

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- I did your mom last night! - Thanks, Dad.

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What's the difference between jelly and jam? A: Nothing Really

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What does AIDS smell like? AIDS has no smell. AIDS is a diease contracted though sexual contact with another being with the diease. It greatly increases the risk of infections and malignancy. Although AIDS has no smell, in the final stages large sores develope on the surface of the skin. This means you are going to die. Thus, HIV/AIDS has no smell.

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A Nazi and a Communist walk into a bar. 10 million Slavs die.

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Hey I just met you, and this is crazy, but I'm your stalker, welcome to my deserted warehouse.

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Is this the Krusty Krab? No, the Krusty Krab is a fictional place, and therefore does not exist.

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A child with cancer grows up.

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What did the bus driver say to the black man? I like your shoes.

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? Because it is very unsafe for blind individuals to operate motor vehicles.

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roses are red, violets are blue, charcoal is black, and my neighbor is too.

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Why did Michael Jackson go to McDonald's? Because he was hungry.

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A visibly exhausted and distressed man walks into a bar and orders a strong drink. "Long day?" the bartender asks. "Yes" the man replies, because he is aware that the bartender wasn't actually asking if the day way long, but rather if the day was hard.

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What's the difference between George Washington and Wiz Khalifa? George Washington died many years ago.

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What's worse than a rainy day? Dropping the soap

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when geese fly in a V patteren why is on side longer than the other? not as many geese on that side

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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