roses are red violets are blue count my five damn finger , and the third one is for you!!!!!!!!

A blonde walks into a library. She is a commerce major.

Meow.

Why did Sara fall off the swing? Because she got shot in the heart with a bolt action sniper rifle and died.

WOMAN! I am not a sweetheart at the core, I am slightly sweet on the outside and really really dark and cruel on the inside, so I can trick people into loving me before I consume them! Anyway, sure, I will get to it, first thing when I wake up, like 8 hours from now okay? Moral: Seriously? Are you hoping to see a sweetheart at my core?

Whats funnier than a dead baby? A dead baby in a clown costum

What do you get when you mix black, white, and Asian? A panda bear

Why couldn't the ten year old watch a porno movie? Because it was on blu-ray and his family only owned a regular dvd player.

how do you make a family tan? You burn them in the house.

Knock knock who's there? Screw this Screw this who? Im screwing this like ur boyfriend screwed you!

How do you find the richest person in Mexico? Google it!

What do yo call four Jewish guys sitting around doing nothing? The Sabbath Day

John has 38 candy bars. He eats 28. What does he have now? Diabetes. John has Diabetes.

What's white and flies around ? A seagull. What's black and flies around ? A seagull in the darkness.

Why do Italian people like pasta? Because it tastes good.

Why did the man die from drinking the water? It wasn't water, it was acid.

What was the doctor's shirt made out of? Cotton

Roses are red Violets are blue I'm horny and your bodily figure is very attractive Get naked

Why do witches ride on brooms? Because they have magical powers!

What worse that punching a baby? Stabing one.

i like tits

Hey you wanna hear a joke? Sure! Well first, do you want part of my sandwich? No thanks.........Are you going to tell your joke? Joke? Um sure. I didn't know I was telling one. Roses are red. Violets are blue. I have Alzheimer's. Would you like part of my sandwich?

Why did the Nazi not help the black man up after he had been badly injured? The Nazi was in a wheelchair.

What do you call two black guys having sex with Paris Hilton? N*ggas in Paris

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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