Person One: Three bears are eating tacos, seventeen bears are making margaritas, how many bears are going to the supermarket to get overly prices expired two percent milk? Person Two: ...Who gives a shit!!!!!!!!?!?!?!?!!!? Person One: No! That is incorrect!..................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................its 16

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Q: What's black and white, and red all over ? A: A penguin in a blender.

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what do lions and potatoes have in common? They each drive a sports car, wait neither the lion nor the potato drive a sports car. Sorry to waste your time with this joke that seemed to not really have a meaning or a clever punchline.

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Why did the blonde put lysol in the soup? to kill her husband

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Q: Why couldn't the hippopotamus get his driver's license? A: He didn't turn 16 yet.

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You want to hear a joke? Democract

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Why did the black man win the race? Because he was talented and hardworking.

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What's worse than a truck full of dead babies? An alive one at the bottom eating it's way out.

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Do you know what they say? Words

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What did the gravel say to the road? Give me the D.

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How did Helen Keller meet her husband? On a blind date.

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why did little marwisheafuck want a cat for hanukock because her dad had ciilled a black priest that ate free mdicks out of a mshitfuck

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What do you call a guy selling drugs? A pharmacist

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Why was the baby upset? Because it accidentally killed its twin brother by pushing it off the bed.

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- Ask me if I'm a firetruck. - Are you a firetruck? - No.

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What do you call a Mexican baptism? A blessed occasion.

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Beans beans, they're good for your heart, the more you eat the less at risk you become to such health problems as diabetes and heart attacks. The increased carbohydrates and antioxidant properties maintain a manageable balance for the body's digestive system to maintain a good constant internal environment.

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What's the difference between Santa and Tiger Woods? Santa is a jolly Christmas figure that delivers presents to children and Tiger Woods is a professional golfer.

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Why did the boy eat his homework? Because he already ate his dog.

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What do you call a one eyed hippo? A do-you-think-he-potamus

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a b c d e f g h i j k l m n o q r s t u v w x y z i left out p.

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why would you thank the KKK because they killed the president

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What was the little boy doing in the deep end of the swimming pool? Drowning.

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2 guys walk on the street and see a pile of crap. One says "That looks like crap." The other one stops and looks at it for a few seconds and says "You're right it is crap." They both avoided stepping on the pile of crap and continued on their walk.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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