What did Steven Hawking say to God after he died? Nothing. He can't talk.

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Girl: Do you like me :D Boy: No Girl: =( Boy: You didn'y ask me if i loved you Girl: :D Do you love me Boy: Naw

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She has no arms.

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What did the girl say to the boy? I don't know it was a private conversation

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Why didn't the blonde go to the party? Her depression finally got the best of her and she shot herself

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why would you thank the KKK because they killed the president

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A man walks into a bar and says "Ouch."

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Why did Billy get a 102% on his Algebra test? He got all of the questions correct including the bonus question. Oh, and he slept with the teacher.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? I threw a refrigerator at it

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Knock Knock Who's there? The visitor is deaf and therefore does not have the ability to respond.

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The Treatment of Steve Bartman

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What is big and white and will kill you if it falls from a tree? My d**k.

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What did the general say before the soldiers got in the tank? Get in the tank

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What did the boy with no arms get for Christmas Mittens

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How many Amish people does it take to change a light bulb? None because they don't believe in technology.

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what do u call a person who reads anti.jokes a hipster

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What's the best part of having a doctor for a best friend? The sex.

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two men are walking and nobody falls becouse they use a power balance

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a little girl is playing outside of her house when i man in a van approaches her and stops to ask if the girl will help him find his puppy and that he has some gandy. seeing as the girl has a great love for animals she gets in the van. the man and the little girl drive around until they find the puppy. the man is so overjoyed her rewards the girl with candy. he then drives her back to her house and she feels wonderful having helped the man find his puppy. the end.

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Why didn't the pharmacist set up his business in the jungle? Because setting up a pharmacy in the jungle is not a viable business option.

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Q: What's white, sticky, and is swallowed by most women? A: Ice Cream

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why is 4 afraid of 5? Because Monkey's eat purple pineapples

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What is invisible and smells like bananas? Monkey Farts.

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why did santa fall of the roof? Because the roof was slippery from the ice.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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