What do a dog and a tree have in common? BARK!

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What starts with "F" and ends with "uck"? F*ck

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Why did the chicken cross the road it didn't, it was hit by a bus.

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7am, waking up in the morning Gotta be fresh, gotta go downstairs Gotta have my bowl, gotta have cereal Seein’ everything, the time is goin’ Tickin’ on and on, everybody’s rushin’ Gotta get down to the bus stop Gotta catch my bus, I see my friends (My friends) Kickin’ in the front seat Sittin’ in the back seat Gotta make my mind up Which seat can I take? It’s Friday, Friday Gotta get down on Friday REBECCA BLACK FTW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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We didnt star the fire ...........

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How many elephants can you fit in a car? Five. Two in the front, two in the back, and one in the glove compartment.

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A man walks into a store and says "Roses are red, Violets are blue, there is a bomb strapped to my chest, give me all the money"

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Knock, knock Who's there? Europe Europe who? No, I'm not, you're a poo!

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Going to bed? Mind if I Slytherin?

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What do you call a horse with out ears? A horse with out ears?

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Person One: Three bears are eating tacos, seventeen bears are making margaritas, how many bears are going to the supermarket to get overly prices expired two percent milk? Person Two: ...Who gives a shit!!!!!!!!?!?!?!?!!!? Person One: No! That is incorrect!..................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................its 16

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What do you call an angry black man? Angry.

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Why did the Jew fall off a cliff? Someone pushed him

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Q: What's black and white, and red all over ? A: A penguin in a blender.

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what do lions and potatoes have in common? They each drive a sports car, wait neither the lion nor the potato drive a sports car. Sorry to waste your time with this joke that seemed to not really have a meaning or a clever punchline.

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Q: Why couldn't the hippopotamus get his driver's license? A: He didn't turn 16 yet.

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Why did the blonde put lysol in the soup? to kill her husband

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Why did the black man win the race? Because he was talented and hardworking.

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What's worse than a truck full of dead babies? An alive one at the bottom eating it's way out.

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Do you know what they say? Words

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What did the gravel say to the road? Give me the D.

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why did little marwisheafuck want a cat for hanukock because her dad had ciilled a black priest that ate free mdicks out of a mshitfuck

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How did Helen Keller meet her husband? On a blind date.

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What do you call a guy selling drugs? A pharmacist

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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