What doesn't have opposable thumbs, barks at the mail man, eats dog food, and is good at every sport? Air bud

Roses are red. Violets are blue. Onions stink. And so do you.

That awkward moment when the moment is awkward.

Why was the picture so dark? Because it was night time and there were no light fixtures located anywhere near where the photo was taken.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because chickens do not possess the mental capacity to grasp the idea of "roads"

A) Knock Knock. B) Who's There? A) Me. B) Oh, well I'm in the shower, just give me five minutes. A) OK, I'll wait in the kitchen, is it cool if I heat up a hot pocket? B) Yeah sure, just not the pepperoni one, I only have one left and I was saving it for lunch. A) Alright.

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

Knock knock Who's there? An elf. An elf who? An elf who wants to be a dentist.

whats black and yellow and makes you smile? a bus full of black people going off a cliff. do you shame is? there was three empty seats.

Q: what's red and goes up and down? A: a tomato in an elevator

A minor walks into a bar. He's not very good at limbo.

Two men walked into a bar. The third transformed into a duck and flew away.

Black Veil Brides.

Yo mama's so fat that when she was diagnosed with a flesh eating disease she was given 10 years to live.

p p p penis. penis's are big and juicy

Q: What's worse than 10 dead babies in a tree? A: I'm sure there are lots of things.

A Mexican walks into a club.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Dandelions are yellow, and so are sunflowers.

You know what isn't funny? AIDS. You know what is? Brittany Spears with AIDS...

Why did the man stay in the basement? Because he was addicted to pornography and it was tearing his family apart. Eventually he was unable to tell the diffidence between fantasy and reality and sexually assaulted his 13 year old niece.

Women's football

Potato.

Penis

Why did the chicken cross the road? He was suicidal.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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