What did Buzz say to Woody? A lot. There were 3 movies.

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y do churches have kneelers?, cuz it puts less stain on ur knees

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So this guy's taking a hooker back to a hotel room, right? The woman turns out to be a federal agent investigating prostitution in inner-city inviornments, and the man is promptly arrested. He is now subject to a large fine and 90 days in a county jail.

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what do you call a girl who sells sex for money? sally

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why did the stupid boy put his clothes on his valentines? because hes stupid

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What's really ugly and smells like a hampster? My hampster.

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Chuck Norris was once engaged by a woman for whom he had to fight a man to obtain all while doing a mundane activity in an unorthodox manner. He promptly declined for he is married and told the man he only fights for self-defense. He proceeded to put his pants on one leg at a time like everybody else.

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A robot walks into a bar. The bartender asks, "can I get you a drink?" The robot replies, "No, I'm a robot."

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What's long and yellow? A yellow tube.

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What do you call a kid with headgear and one leg? Names.

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Guess what happened when a man took off his jumper?? He became cold!

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What's the difference between a black man and a pizza? Literally an endless list of things.

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A priest, a rabbi and an imam walked into a bar and had a great time because all of them worship the same God. (Obs: The imam ordered only soft drinks)

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Why did The chicken cross the road? To get ran over.

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What's worse than 10 dead babies nailed to a tree? 1 dead baby nailed to 10 trees.

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Knock knock It's open

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Two guys walk into a bar. The third one ducks... ...into an alleyway to have a quick smoke before entering the bar his friends went in.

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Wanna here a funny joke? Doug.

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What do the Japanese hate more than sitting in traffic? tsunamis.

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What'd yellow and can"t swim. A black person with a yellow shirt on.

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What do caterpillars fear most? Death.

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Rock, paper, scissors, ebola

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What's a tissue's favorite kind of music? Nothing, tissue's do not have ear canals or ear drums and there for cannot hear any type of sound wave.

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Stephen Hawkings was ice skating on the Eiffel Tower... then he woke up.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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