What did the German say to the Jew? I'm not quite sure; I don't speak German.

thumb_up thumb_down +36

Potato.

thumb_up thumb_down +36

Knock Knock Who's there? No one was there. It was two birds flew into the door and died.

thumb_up thumb_down +34

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +34

A man walks into a bar. Several hours later he staggers out and drives into an oncoming school bus, killing all occupants. He survives to live with the grief for the rest of his life and attempts to commit suicide several times.

thumb_up thumb_down +32

How do you make a teacher cry? Shit in their water bottle.

thumb_up thumb_down +32

What comes to mind when you say the word "Mind?" Your Mind

thumb_up thumb_down +32

Roses are red, violets are blue, trains.

thumb_up thumb_down +32

What's worse than nine dead babies hanging in a tree? One dead baby hanging in nine trees.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

Why did jack smell smoke in his neighborhood? His house burnt to the ground.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

What do you call a black guy with a fan? An African American male Homo Sapien who is most likely hot and sweaty and is probably trying to create cold air and then reduce how hot they are likely reducing the sweat glands natural instict to create ameliorate of sweat and then make him feel better.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

what is funnier then a man with AIDS? -nearly anything as AIDS is a serious medical condition and could be potentially lethal

thumb_up thumb_down +30

Q: How many Mexicans does it take to change a lightbulb? A: Juan

thumb_up thumb_down +30

yo mama is so fat that they call her fat mama

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Why was Timmy sad?

thumb_up thumb_down +28

stop it ryan vallee

thumb_up thumb_down +28

What's big white and cant climb a tree? A refrigerator.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Why cant penguins fly? because they cant

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Q: Where do you find a dog with no legs? A: Probably right where you left him, since animals with no appendages have no way of mobility

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Why couldn't the little pirate see the movie? His dad had just died in a freak accident on the boat. He was going to the funeral that day. Life as a pirate isn't at all as it seems. Little Jimmy the pirate, had nothing. He had no family. His mother dead already, his sister and brother refusing to speak to him because he ran off to be a pirate with his father. Clearly, he had no idea what he was getting into, because his father was gone. What was he to do now? He had no one to go to. The ship mates were all either completly insane or never sober. That very night, Jimmy took the pistol off the ship captian and shot himself point blank in the head. Little Jimmy is in a better place now. With his mother and father. In a place where he cant be harmed any more. I miss you Jim <3. ~ Jack Sullivan

thumb_up thumb_down +28

What did Justin Bieber say when he felt funny? Wheres my tampon

thumb_up thumb_down +28

27

thumb_up thumb_down +28

What is invisible and smells like bananas? Monkey Farts.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

What is a question?

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops