Teacher:What is the outer layer of a tree? Dog:Bark. Teacher: What is the square root of 69? Dog:8.30662386

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What did the gay man order at Starbucks? Delicious, handcrafted beverages and great-tasting food. The secret to making life better.

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Knock knock Who's there? Joke Joke who? Auntie Joke Great, could you bake me those cookies I like.

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Robocop and T-800 where fighting, first the T-800 manages to injure Robocop critically, but Robocop manages to repair himself and break T-800`s legs off, which T-800 suddenly regrows due to an unexpected upgrade. After several hours of combat, where civilians are injured and half the town is destroyed they where both worn out, but ready for one last struggle... ...Eventually there was a great celebration for whoever won.

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How long will it take for a dog to paint a color wheel? I don't know.

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What is the difference between assault and aggravated assault? Aggravated assault is aggravated, whereas assault is aggravated.

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What happens when you shoot a black man? You go to prison because murder is a criminal offense.

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Q. How do Italian girls shave their legs? A. They lie down outside and have someone mow them.

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42

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So a man walks into a bar, he meets a few friends, has a few beers, and at the end of the night he calls a cab to drive him home

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what's the difference between a white man and a black man? their skin color

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How do you stop a bus? Throw small children in front of it. Except it didn't work for the boy with ice cream.

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A woman refuses to make a sandwich and walks away unharmed.

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Knock Knock Come in. Come in who? You're a dumbass.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was dead.

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Whats Mary short for? Shes got no legs

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Why did the plane crash? I don't know. I wasn't on the plane. Its likely, based on the damage, that everyone on board died and therefore couldn't tell you either.

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Sit on Santas lap Boner

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what's the difference between people and horses? people have two less legs.

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Steven hawking drives into a bar Disability

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Why does my friend pick up trash? Because he is a garbageman

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What would you rather do or drag a board?

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Why was the boy sad? He had a Ford Taurus stapled to his face.

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Once upon a time.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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