Looks through the peephole.

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your mom is so dumb she threw a rock at the ground and missed

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Why did the chicken cross the road? For a joke.

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Why did the baby cross the road? It was being dragged by a truck

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Why did the Chicken commit suicide Because he Ms. Reed

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A Man walks in to a bar and orders a pint of lager, he notices something floating on the top of his drink so he calls over the bartender. "Excuse me, I think there's something in my dr-" The man's sentence was cut short as a man with a gun had just walked into the bar. He killed everyone, there were no survivors.

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larry clark i smoke pot and im gay its phillup

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A man is about to rape a girl. Before penetration he carefully and correctly applies a condom as he practices safe sex and is not yet ready to father a child.

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What did the baby say to the banana? -- "mama!"

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how do you drown a blonde? strategically place a scratch and sniff sticker at the bottom of a swimming pool (or just a regular sticker because, quite honestly, they won't be able to tell the difference as the water fills their lungs)

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How do you make Lady Gaga cry? Poke her face? No slap her bum!

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Why did Superman stop collecting stones? Did he ever? Moral: Yes but his kryptonite collection seemed to slow him down at times... until he stopped...

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What did the prostitute eat for lunch? Nothing because she was too busy performing oral sex for money.

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Why did the kid drop his lollipop? He got hit by a bus.

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What's worse than getting a detention? Slavery...just kidding that was a good thing!

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Friends are like penguins because when you throw a polar bear at them they die

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If life gives you lemons, don't accept them because you have a citrus allergy.

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Hey man have you ever seen Stevie Wonders house? ... Neither has he

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What do A Canary and a Groundhog have in common? Nothing, Groundhogs can fly, and Canaries can't dig.

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Who spends too much time on Anti-Joke? ...

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Knock knock Who's there? Johnny Johnny who? Names don't matter. Now shut up and let me in before I kill your family

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What did the umpire yell to the flatulent player at bat? FOUL BOWEL!

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Why Did The Chicken Cross The Road To Get To The Other Side

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How many dead babies can you fit in the trunk of a car? Depends on how much you compress them.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops