How many dull people does it take to replace a lightbulb? One.

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You know what they say about men with large feet? Large shoes.

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What do you call an alligator in a vest? An amphibious mammal wearing clothes. Why would you ask me that.

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What did the black kid get for christmas? Nothing, he doesn't celebrate christmas

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What do you call a deer with no eyes? I don't Know, but we should inform the RSPCA.

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What do you call cheese that isn't yours? Chuck Norris' cheese

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A horse walks into a bar and the bartender says .... Hey, you shouldn't be in here; you're a big and powerful animal and any sudden movement could be dangerous for anyone around you. You have sharp hooves and we don't carry anything ergonomically designed for you to actually drink out of ... so, it's probably best that you just go ahead and get out of here. The irishman at the bar says to the bartender: Why are you talking to a horse as if it can understand you? They do not understand the spoken word and do not have the vocal chords to reply.

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So a man was walking down the street with bananas in his ears when he saw one of his friends coming the other way. When they met up the one friend asked, "Hey you know you've got bananas in your ears?" To which the man replied "What? I can't hear you, I have bananas in my ears."

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whats sad about three black men driving off a cliff in a cadillac? a cadillac seats five.

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Chuck Norris doesn't shave.

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Hey, name is Anita, I am Nero`s nurse, he told me to say that if you wish to speak any further, you are going to have to call him and prove you are not some guy. Say Tifa, do you ever play videogames?

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why was the boy mad at school? something probably upset him.

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How do you make a baby cry? Drop a brick on its head.

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knock knock, who's there, white, white who, white van, RUN!

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What do you call a black man jumping off a bridge? Suicide.

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Why did the man get hit by a van? He was blind, and his guide dog was an idiot.

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Why did the pumpkin stop using the jack hammer? Pumpkins cannot use power tools since they are nothing but orange gourds. But, [for sport] say this ‘pumpkin’ was incarnate; one could assume he was done with his demolition work. He then would return the portable drill to the rental facility and get his deposit back.

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(Two person joke for an audience Joke Teller. "What's the difference between a rabbit and a cowsay?" Accomplice "a what?" Joke Teller. "a cowsay?" Accomplice "what's a cowsay?" Joke Teller. "Mooooooo"

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What does a farmer say when he can't find his tractor? - Where's my tractor?

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THIS IS SPARTER!!! :3

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Roses Are red violets are blue I HAVE FIVE FINGERS THE MIDDLE IS FOR U

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How do you get all the apples off of an apple tree? You pick them

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Why was the black man running away from the cops? He was running a relay race.

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"knock knock" "ill get it honey" "no stay in the kitchen bitch!"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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