A man was drinking vodka at his friends party. He got a headache. He told his friend, and his friend said that there was asprin in the cabinet. The man ate some. He died. He was stabbed from behind, and the blade pierced his lungs.

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Whats worse then a pile of dead babies? One live baby at the bottom, eating its way out.

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13

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What happened to the Jew when he heard about the concentration camps being erected all over Germany? Nothing immediately. Then he and his family went into hiding where they were later discovered, taken to concentration camps and died along with millions of other Jews.

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Whats worse than getting a papercut on the side of your finger? Being shot in the face by a shotgun that shoots fireworks that explodes into chainsaw bullets.

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wat did the candle say to the lighter? nothing candles cant speak because they are inamimate objects, even so i think a candle would just scream anyway, would you buy a screaming candle?

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What do you give a small child when you don't have any candy? Nothing, you just kidnap them.

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What did the cow say to the other cow? How should i know? Go ask them.

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What happened when your mom closed the blinds? You.

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whats harder than watching a dog get hit by a bus? my boner..

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Why was the little girl crying? She got slapped with a porcupine.

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Sorry boss

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How does a black guy call to another black guy in Africa? using a telephone

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HARRY EFFING STYLES

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How do you know a man is Jewish? Because he told you or you met him in a synagogue.

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Women's Sports

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Why was the baby upset? Because it accidentally killed its twin brother by pushing it off the bed.

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue I have five fingers and one of then is poking at you

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What do you call: A black person, A white person, A mexican, A Jew, And an athiest? Whatever their names are!

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want to hear a joke? so a guy comes into a bar, wait no it was a horse so a guy comes into a horse,,,

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Why couldn't Larry walk his dog? Larry doesn't have a dog.

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Whats yellow and cant swim? A bulldozer.

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Q: What do you call a dog with no legs? A: Doesn't matter, he's not coming

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What did Helen Keller get for Christmas? A read along book

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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