Jacob Black and Edward Cullen show up at your house. You tell your best girl friend and she has you admitted to a psych ward because everyone knows they are fictional characters!

Why did the man have a bad day? Well first of all, his wife left him, then his two kids both committed suicide, then a large falcon pecked at him genital area. After that he proceeded to be hit by a car, and soon after he was hit by a bus. Following this, his corpse was raped by a transvestite pig, and then finally his spirit got hit by a plane on its way up to heaven, knocking it to Hell.

What did the blind man say to the librarian? Hello, I am looking for books that are published in braille.

why was the boy so ugly, because he had downs

A Mexican walks into an all white people bar. He then proceeds to buy rounds for everyone in the bar. Everyone thanks the mexican and everyone gets back to doing their own thing.

Period Blood

What is the difference between an Irishman and a plank of wood? Almost everything, including anatomy, chemical make up, mass etc

What did the homosexual say to the purse walking down the street? - I'm a homosexual.

Why did the little boy throw his clock out of the window? After hours of searching for the snooze button to no avail, the little boy became so irritated at the incessant ringing of the alarm that he threw it out of his window in a fit of rage. The clock landed on an old woman who was walking twenty stories below. She was immediately killed on impact.

What is striped black and white? A prisoner in jail arrested for the murder of a 7 year old child.

If you're doing a maths test, what type of pickles are best when licking a baseball bat? Sasquatch

What did the Englishman say to the Irishman? "I am from England"

What's green and has wheels? A bus. I lied about the green.

How do you prevent aids? Nail an orphan to your genitals before sex.

Whats better than winning a gold medal in the special olympics? Not being retarded

A man walks into a bar. Now I have to kill you, because that's top secret information.

why did the chicken cross the road? because it had earlier escaped from its cage and had since began to wonder around the local town

What do you call cheese that isn't your's? Someone else's cheese.

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"Up to 50% off."

Why did the chicken cross the road The light was green

A man walks into a bar, and he says, "ow,".

Nikii manaj is 99.9% fake on her body

whats worse than not getting what you want for christmas? a child melester

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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