roses are red violets are blue i dont really care about you

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Scientist 1: "What's your research paper about?" Scientist 2: "Homosexuality in fruit bats." Scientists 3, 4 & 5: "AHAHAHAHA LOL WUT"

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How do you make a napkin dance? You can't. Stop having such unrealistic aspirations.

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What's the difference between a watermelon and a baby? A watermelon is edible.

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imagine a world without santa ill make it easy, lookout the window

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Hey Patrick Yeah? I found something funnier then 24 Give it to me buddy 25

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Why does Lady GaGa have no hair down there? It's physically impossible to grow hair on your toenails.

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whats the difference between a joke and the holocaust? ...There both funny..Exept for the Holocaust.

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knock knock who's there GET IN THE VAN!

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Cold camel scrotum.

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Two gay men enjoy a wonderful second date together.

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YOLO MAH BROLO

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Why did the girl hang herself? She was constantly bullied in school and on the internet.

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What do you get when you divide 60000 by 30? A Number

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A man powers up his computer but then realizes he's in China.

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What do you get when an Asian and a black person have a baby? Black and yellow. Black and yellow. Black and yellow. :)

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What's worse than nine dead babies hanging in a tree? One dead baby hanging in nine trees.

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Whats brown and smells like shit? Shit.

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A baby seal walks into a club.

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A woman is home washing her dishes when she suddenly slips banging her head on a cabinet. She passed out for a few seconds, then woke to find a great gash on her left cheek, fairly spurting blood. At the emergency room, the doctor asks, "How did this happen?" The woman replied, "My boy friend tried to drown me."

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A muslim bought tickets for a 3pm flight. It was 11am, so in the mean time, he went to a bar to loosen up. His bomb vest accidently went off early, killing everyone in the bar. The flight arrived on-time in San Fransico.

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What is large, white, and can't climb trees? A refrigerator.

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What did Lady Gaga say to Justin Timberlake? "I love the Backstreet Boys!" Justin Timberlake Replied with a Bazooka.

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What does AIDS smell like? AIDS has no smell. AIDS is a diease contracted though sexual contact with another being with the diease. It greatly increases the risk of infections and malignancy. Although AIDS has no smell, in the final stages large sores develope on the surface of the skin. This means you are going to die. Thus, HIV/AIDS has no smell.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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