only one person get beat up chuck norris. Who you say? Bruce Lee. He got lucky because his eyes were closed.

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A man orders 3,687 bricks. He gets 3,688 bricks delivered to him. He throws the extra brick in the air. Ok, so a man is smoking a cigar by a woman with a small poodle. They are both in a plane. The woman asks the man if he could get rid of the cigar because the smoke is making her dog turn green. The man refuses. In anger, she throws the cigar out of the window. The man gets angry and throws the poodle out the window. What lands in the poodles mouth when it's falling? The brick.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing set? Because she had a seizure.

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how do you take a shit in public? pull down your pants and push in public

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What did the prisoner say to the other prisoner? I am going to anally rape you.

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Why did the lady spill her coffee? The waiter accidently ran into her and then apologized.

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How did Muhammed Ali get into Professional Boxing? With a lot of hard work and dedication.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because chicken brains are not as large or developed as human brains, therefore preventing the chicken from making a logical decision, leading to it crossing a road with heavy traffic and eventually being run over by a semi.

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Q: What happens when two feminists try to chanbe a lightbulb? A: That's not funny.

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What do you call an angry black man? Angry.

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What do you have if you have 100 rabbits in a row and 99 step back? That would be a very unlikely thing to happen, unless a mildly scary predator was released in front of them, or they weren't all stepping back at the same time.

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hot diggity dog

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Whats a dwarf running A running dwarf

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what is white and red all over? a ginger

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What do you call 10,000 black men with their heads sticking out of the ground? Afro-turf

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why was the 40 year old still a virgin? it doesnt know either.

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Why are asians so good at maths? Because their culture exercises a hard work ethic in order for many of them to achieve high ranking jobs in order to support their families

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A guy walks into a restaurant and sits down only to realize he is not wearing any pants. Immediately the police are called and arrest the man for indecent exposure. Given there were children in the restaurant at the time, the man is also charged as level 3 sex offender and is held on $100,000 bail. His wife commits suicide from embarrassment, leaving her 10 year old son up for adoption who later gets involved with drugs due to his rough childhood.

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Why was the picture so dark? Because it was night time and there were no light fixtures located anywhere near where the photo was taken.

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How do you know a man is Jewish? Because he told you or you met him in a synagogue.

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A penguin was waddling along one day and saw a seal.. The seal stood up and procceded to talk and jump and even twirled around... The penguin realized this was impossible for a seal to be doing this so he hopped on his unicycle and just rode home because he was going to be late for his piano recital

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Why can't Stevie Wonder drive? There is no steering wheel at the back of the bus.

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Q: How do you learn the best break dance moves? A: I don't know. You figure it out.

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How does a blind bit of difference differ from one that can see?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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