Why can't Hellen Keller drive? Because she is dead.

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when geese fly in a V patteren why is on side longer than the other? not as many geese on that side

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why did the stupid blonde run straight into oncoming traffic? because there was a small child there that could have been seriously injured.

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Why did Jimmy fail his math test? Because he had a mental disability

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i yoused to cry a little when i laughed . then i got raped by a clown.

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-Knock knock -Go away -*Breaks door and shoots*

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If Jimmy has 50 pieces of candy and eats 40 of them, what does he have now? Jimmy has diabetes.

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Why can't Kevin run with scissors? Because he killed himself.

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What do call someone who kills their own children? Casey Anthony

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What did the Englishman say to the Irishman? "I am from England"

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A man is kidnapped shortly after being diagnosed with a new type of cancer in his left hand and is also left handed. When he is dropped off after being kidnapped it turns out a doctor hired the kidnappers to bring him a patient. The doctor notices the tumor is still in a stage where it hasn't spread to the rest of his body. The docter then claims to have a way to remove his cancer with minimal damage to the rest of him. So the doctor pulls out a laser sword and cuts off the man's left hand and says,"There, no more vancer for you!"

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why was the asian kid found dead? he failed an examen

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Why did the plane crash? Cause the pilot was a loaf of bread

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Q: What do you get when you cross Marvel and Capcom? A: Marvel vs. Capcom.

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What is blue and smells like red paint? Blue paint!

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"One fish, two fish, red fish, the holocost." -Dr. Seuss

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Whats why was the 18 year old boy scared of his dad? Cause his dad butt raped him when he was 7.

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What do you call a chicken with its head cut off? A dead chicken. Most likely ready to be cooked/eaten

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Why is Joel so gay and skinny? He was raised by goats with eating disorders.

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Why was the black man shot, He resisted against a highly political challenger. Unfortunately for him the Armenian politician was not a very nice guy.

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A baby seal walks into a club...

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Okay chan, you can have it then, I am tired.

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I little 3 year old girl said to her dog "You're my best friend in the whole world" AND THEN THE DOG DIED!

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Women are definitely a full time job.. You should be paid to have them......

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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