How do you put an elephant in a fridge? Open the door and put it in. How to you put a giraffe in a fridge? Open the door, take out the elephant and put in the giraffe. Simba hosts an animal convention and all the animals attend except which? The giraffe. There is an alligator infested lake. How do you cross? Swim across. All the alligator are at the convention.

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Why couldn't the man reach the police on his phone after his leg was hacked off by a serial killer? He had AT&T as a service provider.

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Whats worse than scraping your elbow and knee? Beheading and disembowlment.

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Whats big red and eats rocks? A big red rock eater

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Q: What do you call a black man sitting on a bench? A: Whatever his name is.

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Your dad is so dumb he tried to put M&M's in abc order

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ARE YOU OKAY? Well thanks for asking actually I could be doing a bit better bu... BUSTER WOLF! Moral: No Im adding moral here, I mean why ask people if they are feeling okay before you break then in half?

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Q: What did the anorexic girl do for thanksgiving? A: Nothing, she was paralyzed from a fall 2 days prior and nobody had found her yet.

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Child birth. So easy women can do it.

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scenario: 12 men in bikinis throwing snowballs at each other in Africa. Question: Who ate all the world's giant pears? Answer: It was an allergy to noses!!

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why did the boy fall of the bridge? He got shot in the head.

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why didnt you take a shower? because my house burnt down

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People with the best sense of humor visit anti-joke.com.

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How did the bald lady die? Of cancer

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? Someone threw a fridge at her...

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A chicken met a chicken, And they were chickens two, Two chickens met two chickens, And they were chickens too. Four chickens met a boiling pot And they were chicken stew.

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Q:why did the woman make a sandwitch. A: cause she is a woman

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How do you punish Helen Keller? Set a restriction on something she enjoys that is equal to the degree of her misbehavior.

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A man went to the doctor and told him he was having the strangest dream. "First I was a tee pee Then I was a wigwam A tee pee, a wigwam. Do you have any idea what could be wrong?" The doctor looked at the man and said "You have aids."

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An Italian, a black man, and a small child walk into a bar. Shortly after it blew up due to a gas leak. 67 people perished.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Not having an apple at all. Yet only worms to eat, such as the the poverty stricken citizens of Ethiopia.

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What did the black man buy at the fruit shop? Some bananas.

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A Banana wrote this...

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What do you get when you cross a zombie with a beer? Nothing because zombies are just another subject dealing with the occult.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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