Why couldn't Roger become an astronaut? Because Roger's a toaster.

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I always tell people " I have the heart of a child! " Then I continue "It's in a jar on my desk"

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Ill wait for you as long as you need Nero, I am just so glad you are alive and well... I know you, you would not be this chatty unless you where doing far worse, I know you will recover, dont think about the time for my sake, ill refresh this page every five minutes or so.

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Why did the girl hang herself? She was constantly bullied in school and on the internet.

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Congratulations you just won a greencard to the USA! YES YOU BETTER BELIEVE IT! WELCOME TO: UNCLEAN SOUTH ARABIA. Press green thumb below = greencard. no srslsy.

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Why did elmo jump of the cliff caus he was depresed

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What did Batman say to Robin before the got into the Batmobile? - Come on Robin, get into the Batmobile.

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LOL. It's East vs LA and Durant

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Knock knock. Who's there? Sorry, wrong number.

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whats pink and fluffy? pink fluff

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A man walks into a bar and the bartender says "Sorry sir we're closed" So the man goes: "Oh, okay. I wasn't sure if you guys were open till' 10pm tonight" and the bartender goes "No, thats only on the weekends" The man thanks the bartender and proceeded to leave the bar. He now knows the arrive earlier the following day.

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why did the man paint his house? because he never wanted to paint his house

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You know what big feet mean? Big socks

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Why did the girl ask her brother for aids? Because her room was a mess

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How do you get them out? Tortilla chips

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What was the pirates grade? Arrr That isn't a valid grade

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What do you call bad anti-jokes? Suckish comedy What do you call suckish comedy? Bad anti-jokes

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What's worse than 9 dead babies nailed to a tree? 1 dead baby nailed to 9 trees.

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Why did Timmy stop running? He got hit by a bus

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A man and woman are out to eat on their first date. When the woman goes to pay, the man explains that he will cover the cost of the meal. That's a good thing because the woman didn't actually have any money. This happens all the time.

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roses are red violets are blue i dont really care about you

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Why don't they sell aspirin in the jungle? Because it is not financially viable to sell pharmaceuticals in a largely unpopulated area.

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Why did the woman have sex with the man? Because she is over 18, which is above all of the legal consent ages in the United States.

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Why do black people call white people "Niggas"? Because they took an overdose of KFC and watermelon, they're actually just insulting themselves.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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