Q: Why did the man have no legs? A: He lost them when his humvee hit a roadside bomb during his last tour in Iraq.

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What did the German say to the Jew? I'm not quite sure; I don't speak German.

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Penis.

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Do is the Most Famous Line on youtube Answer- Do the Flop

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What do Asians eat for dinner? Home cooked meals

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Why are cemetaries gated? Typically, to prevent vandalism and the emotional trama it inflicts on the deceaseds' families.

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A:Your so fat that you take up the hole room B:If i am fat,Then i can crush you down thin head!

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Q:Whats worse then finding a worm in your apple A:You have AIDS

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cms.......?????

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A guy walks into a bar. He puts an icepack on his head so it doesn't swell, and decides to go out for a drink. He walks into a bar and thinks to himself, "that's twice today, maybe I should just go home."

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Two scientists walk into a bar. The first scientist says, "I'll have some H2O." The second scientist says, "I'll have H2O too." The bartender gives them both water, realizing that H2O2 is poisonous and that the second scientist must have simple worded his request poorly.

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*Ring* *Ring* Bartender : Hello? Stranger:Is Mike Hunt their? Bartender: Mike Hunt! Is Mike Hunt here?! Mike Hunt: Oh thank god! I've been anticipating this phone call for a while now! I've been stranded here for hours and my wife's been killed and the killer is still out there!

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Little Miss Muffet Sat on a tuffet, Eating her curds and whey; Along came a spider, Who sat down beside her But was offered the window seat, Because this was Little Miss Muffet's stop

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I was trying to think of a joke to write, but then I became unsatisfied with my creativity and began to spiral into a depressing tangent of thoughts. I just took 37 Ambien, and have approximately ten minutes to live. Instead, I will spend my last moments writing goodbye messages to friends on Facebook and longingly looking at images of the past. Goodbye, world.

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whats the difference between a joke and the holocaust? ...There both funny..Exept for the Holocaust.

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Have you ever met a black man who wasn't good at basketball? I have, quite regularly.

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There is a tiger in front of you a lion behind you and a bear beside you what do you do? Get of the marry go round

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q. what did the fat guy get from burger king a. heart disease

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why did the chicken cross the road Why not

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why do black people hate aspirin? Its white, it works, and you have to pick cotton to get to it.

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A man powers up his computer but then realizes he's in China.

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Roses are red. Violets are purple. Haha. Purple.

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Knock knock whos there punctuation

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Ask me if i'm a tree... "Are you a tree?".... No

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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