The doctor said he had good news and bad news. I asked for the bad news first. He said, "You have AIDS. I asked what the good news was. He said "You will only have it about a year."

a muslim, jew, and catholic went into a bar and sat down and had drinks. The muslim asks the jew "are you macrobiotic". the jew replies "no" and they go about their fun....

Have you seen Stevie Wonder's house? Yes, but he hasn't.

say iphone 5 times then look under your pillow ...nothings there

What did the Polar Bear say when he slid off the iceberg? Radio

Beans beans, they're good for your heart, the more you eat the less at risk you become to such health problems as diabetes and heart attacks. The increased carbohydrates and antioxidant properties maintain a manageable balance for the body's digestive system to maintain a good constant internal environment.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Barrack Obama shops at Baby Gap

Why did Sally Drop here ice cream? She was hit by a bus. Knock Knock? *who's there* Not Sally.

Ask me if im a tree Are you a tree? No

Why does a trash can smell bad? Because there's trash in it.

Roses are brown, violets are brown, who keeps shitting in my garden?

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Becuse 7 was a convicted serial killer. >----->

Q: What do you call a dog with no legs? A: Doesn't matter, he's not coming

Why did the chicken cross the road? There was a wild dog on the other side, so he crossed the road to avoid potential danger.

What did the girl say to the boy? I don't know it was a private conversation

Yo mama so fat she has an increased risk of blood clots!

Why did the black guy go to jail, because he did illegal stuff.

What's the difference between video games and a naked chick? The Holocaust.

What do you say if you see your TV floating in the middle of the night? I'm not sure, but I would probably have nightmares for a couple weeks.

Why did the child step on a ball?

Roses are red, Violets are pencil, this poem makes no sense, refrigerator

How did the semen cross the road I put on the wrong sock this morning

Whats worse than a mother of 3 children, jumping off a bridge, smashing into the metal roof of a large car and dieing on impact? A mother of 3 children jumping off a bridge, smashes into the metal roof of a large car, survives,, becomes paralyzed, and has to explain to her children, why she is in a wheel chair for the rest of her life.

A man walked into a bar. He did this because he was blind and could not see the obstacle in his path.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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