How many cows can you fit in a field? It depends on how big your field is.

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baby loves lalma

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A guy walks into a restaurant and sits down only to realize he is not wearing any pants. Immediately the police are called and arrest the man for indecent exposure. Given there were children in the restaurant at the time, the man is also charged as level 3 sex offender and is held on $100,000 bail. His wife commits suicide from embarrassment, leaving her 10 year old son up for adoption who later gets involved with drugs due to his rough childhood.

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you will now laugh.

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why did the chicken cross the road? to get to your house knock knock who's there? the chicken

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Why did the archaeologist bury his brother? Because he was dead.

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What did the man get when he found a genie in a lamp? The rest of his life in an asylum for schizophrenia.

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How many years old is Chuck Norris? The same amount of years that it has been since he was born.

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What did the cat say to the dog? "Meow."

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What's the difference between a lamborghini and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a lamborghini in my garage.

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How do you have gay sex? I don't know ask Jordan Braun

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A fish swims up stream for his natural spawning cycle. The fish was out of shape and died from heart failure.

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Q:why do bananas where sunscreen? A:beacause they peel!!haha

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What do you do when a guy pulls up in a van with piercings and a gay lisp, what do you do? Get in the van.

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What did santa claus say when he saw a girl standing on the corner? Ho Ho Ho... ;)

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Why did the man throw his watch out the window? Because it was broken.

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3 men walked into a bar... They sat down and had a beer.

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sdrawkcab ekoj siht tleps I whether you like it or not

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When you're climbing up a ladder and you feel something splatter, you may want to see what happened, and then promptly clean up the mess so one one slips.

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Why was the man afraid of the pack of wolves? The man was blind and heard his stomach growling even though he had just eaten two buckets of KFC.

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If all the world was like Jesus...wouldn't we all die on crosses?

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Why was Steve buried in Australia? Because he was dead.

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what's funnier than 3 dead babies in a trashcan pretty much anything thats not funny

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Why can't Hellen Keller Drive? Because she's dead.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops