Why did the man buy a large butcher knife and a shot gun at 3am while his family was asleep at home? because he suffered from insomnia and figured running some errands would give him something to do. his wife had also been telling him that their current knife was getting old and rather dull and since one of his favorite hobbies was duck hunting he decided it wouldn't hurt to buy a new gun considering it was on sale for a reasonable price

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If you asked an alzheimer's patient what the meaning of life is, what answer would you get? Probably an answer that doesn't respond to the question but is bound to be hilarious.

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What did the kid with no arms, no legs, and cancer get for his birthday? A: Polio.

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What did the prostitute eat for lunch? Nothing because she was too busy performing oral sex for money.

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- Mother, where's my bread? - It's in the living room.

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What is a dinosaurs favorite chips? Doritos.

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FAP

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Why couldn't Suzie put on her boots? Because she got her legs amputated.

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what do we want a cure for turrets! when do we want it C U NT !!!

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What do you call a gay lion tamer. It depends on their name.

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Two gay men walked into a bar in a bigoted, small-minded town and were beaten to death with shoes.

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Un petit gars se plante en vélo et il se met à pleurer.

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My Japanese girlfriend just broke up with me. It's okay, there's more of them in the sea.

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What do you call a white man in the NBA? A really good basketball player

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What was the beauty pageant contestant with a bladder control problem told by the judges? You’re an 8.

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What is funnier than an uncontrolled explosions? Most things, because explosions damage property, and cause deaths.

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So a man walks into a bar and says to the bartender I'll have a beer

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Whats the difference between a van with a bunch of babies in the back and a Cadillac with a bunch of babies in the back I don't have a Cadillac in my garage

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Knock,Knock Whos there ? Hola Holo who ? Holocaust Hahahaha

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What did the man do when he saw the dog? Ran it over

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how did little johnny die? i killed him

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What's up? A direction...

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Jack was nimble, Jack was quick, Jack sat on his candle, and burnt his ass.

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Knock Knock Dude there is no door

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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