I was trying to think of a joke to write, but then I became unsatisfied with my creativity and began to spiral into a depressing tangent of thoughts. I just took 37 Ambien, and have approximately ten minutes to live. Instead, I will spend my last moments writing goodbye messages to friends on Facebook and longingly looking at images of the past. Goodbye, world.

why did the chicken cross the road Why not

Whats the square root of x^2? Variables cant be gay

A shark walks into a bar and the bartender says why the long face. The shark replies i dont have cancer just a terrible drinking problem.

There once were two muffins in an oven, and one definitely did not start talking to the other

Why was Timmy sad?

knock, knock! who`s there? it`s me ! who me? yes!

What's the difference between Kim kardashian and lebrOn James?? Kim got a ring this year

How do you make a napkin dance? You can't. Stop having such unrealistic aspirations.

Q: What's the point? A: .

Q: Why did the cookie go to the doctor? A: Because he had terminal brain cancer.

What is 18 inches long and makes a woman scream all night? Crib death.

How many feminists does it take to change a light bulb? Trick question! Feminists can't change anything.

What do you tell a woman with two black eyes? That she should train harder for her next boxing match, or find a less physically demanding hobby to partake in.

What's 5+7? Piccillo

Where did Jimmy go after the bombing? Everywhere.

Knock Knock Come in

Guy: If you can guess what's in my hand, you can have it. Girl: If it fits in one hand, you can keep it!

Why did the black man die? Why didn't the black man die?

Your dad is so dumb he tried to put M&M's in abc order

What do you call a muslim? A terrorist

Whats the difference between a watermelon and a black person? Ones fun to hit with a baseball bat, and ones a watermelon.

I saw a chameleon. Then it died

What did the man say when he was hit with a flying watermelon? Ouch.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...